working on QOL page updates. sorry about

Sorry, I have not updated in so long! I got really tired of static HTML, but I've really wanted to update. My girlfriend and Instagram story viewers have been forced to see all my media rambles (and Zed and Citrus and others too really). I finally sat down and started sorting out the media page and can update again though things aren't perfect still.
Anyways! Onto the media!
I'm In Love with a Villainess I saw via Instagram reels. Anime yuri is evolving. This was inevitable of course- with the yuri renaissance in manga happening, of course we'd get more good yuri anime as those works get adapted. This one just really surprised me.
I actually really dislike fantasy most of the time. Often reading it feels like sandpaper to my brain. This is not always the case though, but I feel it a lot of the time. By fantasy, I mean like.. I don't know how to describe it. TTRPG style fantasy I guess? The worlds you'd see in Pathfinder. The world of Baldur's Gate.
So I wasn't super interested in this at first, but I gave it a try because I thought the spin of 'isekai'd and seeing girl you love' but yuri was inherently interesting. And the anime really played into that! It has a lot to say! So much. Commentary on media improving the life of those who can't survive capitalism, the main character knowing she's isekai'd and taking advantage of game mechanics (likely common to the genre but i don't typically consume isekai), the video game logic, the commentary on how lesbians are perceived and casual homophobia people exhibit, it's all fantastic!
It even has a plotpoint about how it's bad to constantly be around someone you love but refuse to pursue them because you 'wish for their happiness.' I really adored it. This anime was MADE ME FEEL FED. I'm.. really happy I watched it. I don't feel super motivated to read the manga because I feel like it's gonna do the RPG thing where you leave daily life and get involved in Politics and War and Revolution, and that doesn't interest me at all, but I may try to read it anyways because I feel like everything I wasn't looking forward to.. My expectations were constantly exceeded!
I really do recommend it. There are some weird plotpoints and moments I dislike that are part of the reason I really dislike the fantasy genre.. Weird fantasy racism, kind of weird classism sideplot, etc, it's kind of meta because she is isekai'd and in story it kind of feels like the racism is just part of the game, but i really dislike that. It's another reason I'm putting off the manga. I don't know if it will be addressed. I don't think it will be. I never finished FE:3H because it's handling of racism was so upsetting to me and while the anime bothered me a little bit, I worry the manga will push me over the edge and I'll lose my fondness for it.
But, if you can overcome that fantasy racism (which I know the average anime fan can, I'm just irritable) then you will really like it if you are looking for yuri!
2025-07-05
18+
During the Menhera VN Jam, I was a judge and reading many VNs all the time. Those two reasons are why I never publicly made logs on this website. But now Toxic Yuri VN Jam i shere, and I am heavily invested but NOT A JUDGE. SO I CAN TALK SO MUCH.
I'll only be reading entries recommended to me or that catch my eye or if I just like the dev. Let us begin~
The first entry I read was Let's Go to Heaven. I left a long comment and probably had a much too wordy conversation with dev (haha), but it was hard not to contain myself due to loving it so much and also being impressed by many aspects of it. The artwork, writing style, music, and gui all go together really well. Vibes and aesthetics on point!
The main character experiences anhedonia which is a symptom I tend to also experience for long periods of time. For this reason, I immediately liked her. Her aggressiveness towards someone's friendly and playful attitude really appealed to me.
The other female lead, Elphis, is really interesting. Delightful in certain ways, anxiety inducing in others. Their dynamic is good.. A relationship brought on by similar feelings, but calling those feelings 'love' would ultimately be inaccurate.
This entry being my first got me really pumped for the rest. I have no idea what people are making aside from one project I've seen in passing, so I can't wait!
2025-07-05

Cyberbulli was so fucking funny. The main character reminds me of my elementary school/middle school self in a lot of ways. When I lived in a majority white/Christian area and was suffering and believed myself to be much better than my peers. It's a kind of character I like to read when done well, and she is done very well.
Reading Cyberbulli was fun for a variety of reasons that I put into words in a comment, but let's go. Cyberbulli is an example of a kind of work I really desire from the yuri genre. The plotline is a plotline you'd see in a 2000s movie but with intense lesbian mental illness. The main character reminds me of the protagonist from My Heart is a Chainsaw in some ways (which I loved).
Cyberbulli is something I'd definitely read during one of my media binges. I love serious works, but also, I love things that make me laugh super fucking hard and this really did. It really impressed me with how hilarious it managed to be.
Also, the stylistic choice with the text was good and it felt really satisfying seeing it uses in an interesting way near the end. The ending is also so fantastic. Exceeded my expectatiiions. I say I hate comedy a lot, but it's a huge lie I say to avoid explaining my sense of humor. Thank you for making me laugh.
2025-07-05
18+
Omg hi. I totally wasn't gone for ages. Anyway, I read this cute yuri doujin called Anata ni Ai wo Anata ni Hana wo (I think.. A flower for You, Beloved? Something like that) a few days ago. I finally got over my fear of dynasty scans and began to organize the tags I was willing to look through and somehow came upon this.
It's a sweet story about .. elves? I think. It's about a prostitute who sleeps with a soldier. The prostitute has more to her than meets the eyes, but nothing sinister or anything. It's told very gently.. Sweetly.. I was very surprised by it. I don't read a lot of good yuri that read any sort of impression on me. Also, I like the dynamics between the two characters. You can tell the mangaka is on the side of sapphics.
It's NSFW by the way. It has an epilogue and wah. It's just so cute. I am fulfilled. I ended up-she has to stop talking before she reveals too much about her personal life.
2025-03-18

Rental Onii-Chan is a nice story I kind of wish I'd read when I was younger, but am also very happy I didn't read as I think it might've been what made child me finally kill herself. JUST KIDDING! Maybe. Anyway, it's a very sweet story about a girl being taken under the wing of a temporary brother while her brother is at home being a pos.
For a very long time, I refused to read stories with children due to my own trauma. I would sometimes find myself envious of them or wishing I could relive my youth in a positive light. I realized while reading this I seem to have completely gotten over that period in my life as I just found found to be a peaceful read that allowed me to reflecton my past. I also liveblogged it to my friend Bella who I knew had either read it already or would really like it. It's nice reading something so heartwarming. I miss my sisters!!! WAAH!!!!!!!!!! Also sorry for long break.. I haven't been reading things worth talking about or I just don't finish things..
2025-03-18

To be honest, I think Dragon Ball Daima is perfect and truly captures the soul of Akira Toriyama's works outside of Z and Super (which.. Super is complicated I know). It made me very happy. I have really been wanting something like this from Dragon Ball for a long time. I've always been curious what's going on elsewhere in the Dragon Ball Universe because so much is implied, and Daima gave me a lot of fun. There are some goofy plot things, but I had so much fun I didn't mind and the show itself seemed to embrace the goofiness.
The combat is some of my favorite I've seen in the series. The combination of magic, ki, and hand-to-hand combat satisifies me. I enjoy a well choreographed fight scene, and while I looove Dragon Ball, sometimes the light beams.. well... it doesn't interest me. Also, I got to see all the characters as WIDDOL BAPOIES. i love kid goku, but i will say i've been putting off consuming all of dragon ball because my favorite character is vegeta and it's hard to know i'll be watching an entire series without him.. but EEE WE GOT LITTLE VEGETA. JUST A BAPIE. I NEVER EXPECTED THIS IN MY WILDEST DREAMS!!!!!!!!! HES JUST A BAPIE. AN AARGGOANT BAPIE WHO FLIES A BIT CROOKED. CRYYY. And the moments between him and Bulma warmed my heart. It's so nice that it's after Majin arc as it provides a lot of context on his attitudes at the time. I feel like every character got to have a good amount of spotlight WHICH WAS SO PLEASANT. I'm so used to Goku stealing the show or Vegeta getting his ass beat or Piccolo just standing there or side characters just being goofy, but everyone had a purpose. It was just so fantastic. I really loved Daima.
I got to the end of Daima and cried actually. The reality of Toriyama's passing hit me like a truck. I love Akira Toriyama's work despite how he draws black people at times, but I was a bit.. out of touch? A lot of recent Dragon Ball content I've been putting off watching, but I'd like to at some point. I also like Dragon Quest which has a lot of Toriyama's soul, so.. it hurts knowing I won't see something by him anymore. It really felt like his final gift.. Also I've never seen GT but props on the SS4 transformation. It was fantastic. One of Goku's best designs. His kind eyes and gentleness is still there despite the overwhelming strength he has in this form. I'm tearing up. Thank you Akira Toriyama. PLEASE BE IN HEAVEN EATING LOTS OF SASHIMI AND KOBE BEEF! FLY HIGH!
2025-03-18

I put off watching Look Back forever but did some months ago becuase my girlfriend really loves it. She loves Fujimoto's works in general, but I believe Look Back is her favorite. I really liked it. It made me cry. It felt like a more pessimistic/adult version of Whisper of the Heart.
It was weird. I watched Look Back I think around the time Meat Girl got kind of popular, and I'd never really had a project have any sort of.. attention like that. It felt like I watched it at a good time because I felt kind of weird seeing so many people play it. Seeing people call one of my characters' a crazy bitch to other people wishing there was more in the story that I'd never intended to add. It made me really reflect on what I really want and desire.
I love when people play my games, but I also am so obsessed with improving that I have a hard time viewing any metric as a 'reason to continue.' I've discovered I experience great satisfaction listening to the thoughts of my peers. In fact, it is extremely painful to me when someone tells me they'll play my games and they don't, so I try not to bring up the fact that I make games and I try to just change the subject when people talk about playing them. It's not that I hold grudges- it's just that my work means so much to me that having someone I know say they'll play it feels.. like they are making me a very intimate promise. I'd rather them not do that.
Anyway, Look Back made me think about a lot of my feelings regarding myself and my work and also various interactions I've had with others. People tell me I inspire them, but I kind of just.. didn't believe it. Sometimes I wonder if the people I taught how to draw in the hospital still draw because of me. I doubt it, but it's nice to think about. I hope someone makes some weird esoteric game after playing mine. These feelings are nice... I want to cherish.. the things people say to me. It's so easy to get caught up in everyone being better than you.. to the point of giving up.. I threw away my drawings like Fujimo did and felt horrible as people insulted me. But I'm still here I guess. It's a bit satisfactory.
2025-03-18
18+
Hello. I apologize.. I am the last person on Earth to play this game, and everyone was forced to walk on egg shells around me regarding it because I'm like "no spoilers c:". Unfortunately, even when people aren't trying to spoil Mouthwashing, they tend to talk about it's themes and substance to the point where I knew the twist/core of the story. Unfortunately, I feel as though knowing this spoiled a lot of the interest I could've gotten from the story of the game. Um, though I'm honestly not sure. It was really fantastic, well made game.
I did kind of put this game off knowing it wouldn't be one of my favorites though I did enjoy it. The visuals are awesome. The nightmare sequences are beautifully done though I do think some are unneccessary and overstay their welcome a bit (horse labyrinth). The game did genuinely make me feel fear at times (horse labyrinth, intro section, etc) and frustration at other times. By the end of the game, actually, fear I would've had at certain sections were gone because I was a bit tired of.. the dream sections. Which is strange right? I should love them. You know me. I think the core reason I don't connect with Mouthwashing is because exploring the psychological torment of that particular character interested me very little. So I kept going through these dream sections that were fantastic, but as they kept going, I just kind of took deep breaths and went "you know I get it already." If I was less frustrated with horse labyrinth, baby ultrasound labyrinth, I'd probably be fine. I actually think horse labyrinth is what did me in and baby ultrasound labyrinth was what really did me in HAHA.
The game is good. It was a nice experience. It was a good experience... I just fail to get much out of it. I hate men more maybe? I trust them less? I realize the beauty of low poly first person perspective? Hm, I don't know what's wrong with me. I actually like. Okay. Here we go. For real spoilers now.
It Didn't Hurt People Enough
Hours before playing Mouthwashing, I wrote in my diary entry "i have a lot of fears of getting pregnant against my will and not being able to do much about it, so it'd ease both of those worries." regarding the possibility of birth control. In fact, before, I specifically used the word 'rape' in that sentence but felt it was too harsh a word to use. This is actually one of biggest fears. Giving birth and being pregnant is my biggest fear. So playing as Jimmy in this game when I feel like the narrative doesn't directly focus on Anya and her suffering (which I realize is the point I KNOW) makes it hard for me to really connect the way the story wants me to. That is to say- the way Anya is handled isn't bad. It's just a lot about her suffering is left unsaid in game, but it is there narratively. There is So Much.
At one point, Swansea says he should've protected "the kid" but he's not even referring to Anya even, he's referring to Daisuke climbing in the vent and getting electrocuted and being in a near death state. And in his speech, like, his speech is definitely about what he did to Anya and his other actions onboard the ship, but like, it feels.. like it's not.. enough for me. Like I know her suffering, her closeness with Curly, and all that is a big plot point in the story, but the fact that we're locked to Jimmy's perspective most of the time, and like, even Curly, who is constantly called 'a better man' who protects Jimmy despite knowing he's a RAPIST, HOGLDFUGHJ. I don't know.It feels. painful. Like, it feels like.. I couldn't have written a story like this because I tend to have enough in humanity that I'd assume Swansea would fucking GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ANYA BEING RAPED AND THEN KILLING HERSELF.
I guess I kind of like... I am well aware of the actions of evil of men. I know things like this happen in real life- part of the reason I'm considering going on birth control. And I guess, playing this game.. It just kind of made me go "huh, men really are the fucking worst." Curly laughs in his state or Jimmy imagines him laughing when he takes the gun that Anya had been hiding and kills Swanson, proving that Anya's fears would come to pass. And it just feels. There's so much about Anya actually. It kind of just makes me sick to my stomach. It's hard for me to really think. I know the narrative doesn't need to scream Anya's name, and a woman's pain is often silent. To be honest, men don't often come to her side and she does suffer alone. But I guess like.. I know that. I don't know.
I guess this game scared me. Having authority figures who should protect you let the worse possible thing happen to you is horrifying. And then he kills everybody in the process trying to hide his mistake and goes 'Curly they'll think you're a fuck up too,' and this fear makes Curly just hesitate and not stop Jimmy.
Anya says 'I have to believe our worst moments don't make us monsters' but does it matter if someone is really a monster if they take everyone down with them? Does someone's intent matter if they allow someone's wrecklessness and lack of humanity to spiral out of control- endangering everyone in the process? Jimmy still isn't depicted as the worst kind of person, and Swansea seems to view Jim's worst crime as being a coward. Is rape so normal to them that it doesn't cause them to view him as scum. Jim constantly fails to take responsibility, but can a jackass like him really understand what responsibility is in the first place?
I wonder if I wish we could've gotten a nightmare segment where Jimmy experienced the horror he wrought onto Anya. Or maybe I wish for a world where this game doesn't make me even more mistrustful.
I now have more thoughts after asking my friend who I steam shared the game from who said "I hope this hurts." Apparently, the dev was aiming it towards people in the industry (so the players specifically.) I think. It hurts even more now. It hurts so bad. That a tale like this has to exist. It hurts so bad. That people like the protagonist are playing the game. A lot of them won't even realize they're followiing the same path of Jimmy and Curly you know? Or maybe they do? Maybe they don't care. It hurts to know that you all exist. It's kinda funny to me that Jimmy ended up alone in space and Curly got sent out in a pod to probably float in oblivion forever while people in the industry gain wealth through suffering until they die. Most of them will never experience the horror Anya experienced, and I guess that's why Jimmy is never forced to acknowledge her personhood at all.
Honestly I have endless thoughts about this game especially after discussing it further with a friend who has similar feelings to me but I think it boils down to me feeling frustration at this game being aimed at abusers, playing as an abuser, and the game being palatable to men who won't even realize what the core of the problem is. As such, people's reactions to this game kind of disgust me. Curly is human. Jimmy is human. Swansea is human. But you know, those people are in your offices tormenting women everyday, and their comradery and relatibility to one another matters more than their victims' suffering.
2025-02-03

Well, Uzumaki came out after all these years. I liked it, but it does not live up to the manga at all. It did make me want to reread the manga though.
I have a lot of feelings about the anime. I think the OST was really spectacular. It really is what I imagined the background music of the story Uzumaki to be. I'm actually listening to it right now.
The dip in animation quality from EP1 to the other episodes was disappointing, but I don't really want to rag the animation team because God knows I'd rather animation look bad than people be overworked, and I think "poor" animation can be okay if done well. It's just sometimes things in Uzumaki looked kind of goofy- to the point where I'd sometimes laugh because of how off the animation looked at times. It's a bit disappointing, and I don't completely understand it because the anime was only.. 4 episodes? I want to know the story of the production so bad. Why did the animation drop so hard? Was the budget really tight? What was going on with the staff? I don't know.
The pacing was really rough. I expected them to approach Uzumaki by animating just a few of the stories- not every single one of them. Episode 2 was by far the worst example of this, which is a shame because I love the hair part in Uzumaki. It's so beautiful illustrated in the manga. Episode 2 had so much packed into it. I can think of a few stories that could've been cut which wouldn't have changed the atmosphere of Uzumaki at all. I just wish they'd prioritized telling a slower story rather than jamming as much of the manga in as possible..
I don't think it captures a fraction of the beauty of the manga's story, but I still liked it as someone who loves the manga. I'd be angry if I watched the anime before reading the manga though haha. Oh god. I'd be so mad.
It proved to me that an anime can be done with Junji Ito's works because I think episode 1 really pulled it off, and I think episode 4 could've been close if it had been a bit slower.. Just.. My friend and I were watching it, and it kind of felt like things were just Happening one after the other at breakneck space. I also think even though the anime dropped in quality, there were still a few beautiful things like the backgrounds and the old ruins and the like.. I still liked the art.. Just wish they had a larger team and bigger budget, or... A better director who knows how to work with a smaller budget I guess
2024-10-21
Hello! It's been a while since I updated here. I had to read a lot of entries for the menhera vn jam, and originally I was going to write stuff down for all of them but by the end my brain had melted LOL. In the last weeks, my body also started having a series of strange health issues that made doing anything that required energy impossible, so now I've been playing video games. I'll log a few of them here and some I've played in the past because I've played many games since checks date... 11.21.23 lol. Probably not all tonight though. I'm super tired lately.
Since I've been in an RPG Maker mood and RPZinemaker is back, I've decided to check out games that were brought up among applicants. Games by Studio Investigrave were mentioned a lot,so I went to their itch.io page and looked through their things. I'm working pn two games that take place in winter, so I decided to play Cold Front for sweet inspiration. It was a fun game with cool mechanics. I don't think I've played an RPG Maker game with QTEs before. I looked through the files and saw she didn't even use a plugin for it, just used events and pictures, which is pretty awesome. There was also some 2.5D stuff which was nice to look at. Visually it was a very beautiful game.
The writing was fun. The characters were pretty over the top in a way that reminded me of webtoons I read when I was younger. It made me nostalgic. Actually the entire experience kind of reminded me of horror games I'd play as a kid on gameshed... The QTEs.. the big borders.. 2.5D.. It was nice. I could tell it was a gamejam game, but I'm still happy it was my first studio investigrave game.
2024-10-06

Next is Married In Red. I think Married in Red is the only other Studio Investigrave game I've played so far as the other ones are visual novels, and due to reading many vns recently, I'm taking a bit of a break from them. Married in Red was honestly fantastic. The art is spectacular, and I really enjoy the gameplay. It also reminded me of old gameshed games. The games UI is really beautiful, and I love Bok-su Go. The story is pretty predictable, but that doesn't take away from the fun of it. It's 2010s RPG horror in peak form to me. Fun art, cool sprites, murder, puzzles, memorization! Yay!
I'll probably replay it in the future when my memory of it has faded. I truly did have such a good time. I think it's also an interesting study in making a game that takes place in a smaller environment, as Married in Red takes place in a wedding venue with just a few rooms and a backyard
2024-10-06

The final one I'll talk about for now is re:curse. re:curse is a game by devpalmer. It's endlessly interesting- to the point of me wanting to get VX Ace so I can go through the project files. It features Caroline, who appeals to me, a Glados lover (it makes sense if you play.) She's a virus in the shape of pierrot. At some point she explains why she took her form and says something along the lines of 'does the jingling of a pierrot's bells not please you?' SO REAL AND TRUE. Lots of really good lines in this game really.
I think it's fun and it features Joan (heart eyes). There's two endings. Both of them caused me to feel extreme amounts of sadness, especially after experiencing Caroline House, which is an executable that displays content based on some files in your game. This game makes me gooo brrrBRRRBRRRR... I highly recommend it.. And umm.. The door puzzles...... Well... There's not many, and they're pretty easy to do- provided you don't get a headache!
2024-10-06

damn girl where have you been. well. well. i was reading mostly random i found on bato and i didn't really feel like logging any of it because so much of it was heavily nsfw... i've finally regained my senses haha. i don't remember how i found this manga actually. Mr. Right Turns Out to Be A Younger Woman feels like something i would've read a long time ago. happy i read it now though. it was good. it tackles the struggles in relationships with larger age gaps in a graceful way I feel. all of the characters are a delight. i wish it were longer though.
there's a line that says "the forcefulness of a man was something that never interested me but now it is giving me courage." it made me really happy. so real and true!
2024-07-31

i've actually been reading lots of things and dropping even more things, but today I will try to catch up on some of the things I've read. Certainly not all of it.
Let's begin with Manly Appetites: Minegishi Loves Otsu. This is a boy's love manga! How surprising for me, a the yuri addict, to be reading boy's love? Well, yeah. After reading She Loves to Cook / She Loves to Eat, I saw this in the recommendations on myanilist. It looked so cute ⸜(。˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝. I love manga about food due to my nutrition fixation and also, seeing fat protagonists makes me very happy! I love when mangaka bring new designs to the table.
This manga was very sweet. Minegishi is one of the cutest characters ever. I WISH I HAD A PARTNER LIKE MINEGISHI-SAN! Wait. I've been talking a lot about my sorry love life a lot on this page lately. I should really stop. But it's so hard. He loves Otsu despite Otsu being like.. a mean cat. Or he loves him because he's like that. And Minegishi's rambles about Otsu are so cute! When he says he worries about his health but also likes to watch him eat. かわいーです!! I cry.
It was just a very sweet manga that made me very jealous. I really would like to read more things like that. Just cute fluff. At times, I got bored because it was nothing but fluff, but.. it was.. just so cute. I think I might be hypocritical. I often dislike when girls in yuri are just moe blobs.. but it does feel like a big aspect of this manga are the men behaving in moe ways. Otsu is compared to a fat cat and Minegishi is super excitable. But it's just really interesting seeing these serious salary-men in this situation. Though at times, I thought "why aren't you guys together already!"
Highly recommend. Favorite BL manga I've ever read I think.
2024-04-18

Yay, Ebisu-san to Hotei-san! I found this in a big yuri document. And I was like "oh office workers I'll read this." It's from 2010 and a collaboration between a husband and wife couple! So cute.
It's very cute. It was actualyl a lot more serious than I anticipated. There's a page in it that says "If Shrimp Mayo (Mayo Ebisu) were older, or the opposite sex, maybe I would admire her or something. But she's my age and she's a woman. So the more she shines, the messier things get- jealousy, anxiety, feelings of inferiority. It's all so confusing."
It tackles the feelings of being young and jealous earnestly without portraying the protagonist as a bad person for experiencing these feelings.
Mayo Ebisu, the love interest who's very skilled, is a lovely character. I won't spoil what her deal is but when you find out, it's really sweet. I haven't seen a character like her in yuri before.
I definitely recommend it. It's in a super cute art style too. Wah. I wish the couple made more yuri but it looks like they mostly write straight romance and this was a bit of a new thing for them.. I'll give it a try!
2024-04-18

Crush of the Decade sure is a story. It's about a girl who's had a crush on her friend for 10 years....
I didn't really like it. The pay off was bad. The best friend was pretty annoying. I wish it'd had a more realistic spin. Just.. as someone who has had a long term crush, it's.. Kind of uncomfortable to watch the protagonist just be okay with her crush not returning her feelings for so long and never getting upset at her for any of the actual bad things she does. I kind of get it because I've had a crush who I was okay with never returning my feelings- I was just happy to be happy and around her, but.. It is heartbreaking. I don't know. It's just kind of.. Ugh... The story just feels so bad. It doesn't really explore and nobody grows as a person T_T
I. feel like it could've a heartwarming story about someone falling out of love slowly by analyzing how someone is treating them but still learning to love them as a friend, but it's not about that. It's kind of like.. Maybe you should just have a crush for 10 years. Maybe you should date while you still have a crush on someone else. I just don't get why the webtoon author wanted to tell this story. The main characters are so irritating.
The after story was my favorite of the manga as it focuses on a character named Joy who is the dreamiest woman ever. I love her, and she deserves the world. JOY. IF YOU EXIT. WAIT FOR ME.
2024-04-18

If you use Instagram and get manga ads, you've definitely seen A Scorned Wife's Revenge. It's that manga where a woman discovers her daughter's is having an affair with her hubsand.
I'm going to spoil all of it because it's three chapters and it's not really interesting. Wife finds out, tries to stay with him and look past it but is disgusted by the teacher, reveals to class that teacher is having an affair with everyone.
I've gotten access to quite a few mangaplaza manga. They're.. okay. I've read some good ones, but this one.. It just has that weird flavor of misognyny these manga often have. The way the teacher responds when she's revealed.. She has self indignation which is so weird. These manga often portray the women who are cheating or hurting the protagonist as selfish "bitches" basically. I don't like it. I think it's so flat.
More, the wife finding out about the teacher's other affairs is not shown to the reader which would've been interesting. It's just revealed. Haha. Yeah. It almost feels like this manga just exists to get people to check out mangaplaza. It needs to be longer, the teacher needs more character, and the happily wrapped up ending just feels too unrealistic.
2024-04-18

Dear Girls Who Have Grown Up is an ongoing manga. The first arc is finished and only four chapters. I plan to write a longer piece about this manga and another manga called 'Everyone Is An Idiot But Me,' but I don't know if Everyone Is An Idiot Is Finished and it doesn't have arcs the same way manga does.. Anyway in short, I'm going to talk about this briefly.
I really enjoyed this manga, the parts out right now anyway. It's another revenge manga, from the perspective of the antagonist. I feel like it actually shows that even mean/bitchy women are multifaceted and often have reason for being the way they are.
The revenge is honestly really nice to read which I feel makes it obvious that you should make bad characters multifaceted instead of just making them a caricature of a mean irrational women haha. Seeing the main character's life fall apart due to the consequences of her own actions (with the help of some revenge plotting from another character) is fun. Though by the end, I still felt bad for her. It was just still a good read. It's nice to see someone who's been cruel to others get their comeuppance.. Though it feels misognynistic at times. I will talk this in my longer writing.
I wish it was longer, and I'm looking forward to the completion of the next arc.
I don't know if i'll talk about my mangaplaze reads on this page anymore... They're all pretty dull to be honest.
2024-04-18
18+
hi. gay people. there's an 18 section in this writing but it's towards the end. the maain parts of the manga are fine for a general audience.
anyway, i have been blessed by the yuri gods (twitter thread) with this manga. the manga in the thread was actually The Neighbor's Temptation, a short smut GL manga that is so devoid of any type of development that I decided to not bother dedicating a section towards it. I read that and really enjoyed it for what it was (giant Amazonian woman seducing crabby writer (lesbian)) and saw in the thread that the manwhaga also made How to End an Unrequited Love, a story that looked rather cute on the surface.
I read it, and it was fun. I often struggle to get myself to read manwha due to the fact that often they spiral into meaningless drama that gives me an aneurism. This story felt really simple. All of the complications characters faced were really entertaining, and the characters were all very lovable. Even one of the lesbians I considered to be unlikable had a really good reason for Being That Way, and her story was the one that I connected with most by the end. Some aspects of her story were noted to be removed by the manhwaga which I think could've made her story even more satisfactory to read, but in it's current form, it's still good.
Jiyoo is such a sweet heart. So angry. While I loved Seim Cha because she was made to appeal specifically to dorky unloved lesbians who dream of an experienced woman wisking them away (haha), Jiyoo was a very realistic character who I fell in love with. So sweet and angry. All of her faces are so funny. And also, she's drawn so beautifully. I'd like a friend like her- even if she is a bit much at times.
There are side stories at the end, both are really good. I won't spoil what the first is about but I am going to talk about the second one LOL. It's 18+ so 18+ section starts now.
When I started An Unrequited Love, I was unsure if there was any NSFW content. The Neighbor's Temptation is just straight up smut so the manwhaga pivoting to a cute yuri was interesting though we all have multiple interests. I got to the NSFW side story and was like "oh okay, I guess I will read this." I didn't really find the NSFW in The Neighbor's Temptation really interesting and just preferred the parts of the neighbor trying to seduce the writer, so I also didn't expect this to find this that interesting either. I am just not a big smut reader.
Well. The manwhaga gets it. She gets it so much LOL. I died. I died (,,*﹏*,,). I am typing this from the grave. Thank you yuri gods. I love you Seim Cha.
2024-03-12
18+
Almost two months Mala!! Two months!! You left us starving for manga recommendations for two months!! How fucking could you!!
even worse.. i saw on your myanilist that you have been reading.. you just haven't been updating -_-
Well. Yes. I have been reading things but not updating my thoughts. According to MyAniList, I read Inside Mari two months ago. I actually think I read it lying in bed during exam reason. I wanted to feel miserable.
It's a very fascinating manga that kind of feels like it was made to appeal specifically to me. I think I had a hard time writing anything about this manga because it's impossible to say all of my thoughts without spoiling the entire thing. I will try my best.
I started writing a sentence then immediately. Failed.
Okay.. okay.. Inside Mari is an interesting work that could inspire a lot of repulsion in the viewer. Without knowing how it ends, you simply have to accept the story that comes to you.
As a lesbian, I really liked this story. I think people of other identities could really like this story too. I kind of felt like the straight commenters had a lot of things lost on them. It was kind of frustrating haha.
I'll try to reread this in the future and dedicate an entire page to it.. I'd like to dissect it bit by bit more freely.
2024-02-09

Shimeji Simulation has a lot of profound things to say about isolation and growing up. did you know shimeji simulation was also published in a yuri magazine? i did not know this. well.
anyway, i had a long discussion with my friends when shimeji simulation ended. surprise surprise- a lot of people in my server were reading it at once. we ultimately came to the conclusion that shimeji simulation is a manga about isolation. you can be brought together by simple things like school, but that can all end in an instant due to a little thing called "growing up" and you are once again floating on your own little island
2024-02-09
18+
I read Maka Maka because I saw images of it on Twitter. The images were of two girls being intimate with one another in what appeared to be a romantic way. That was enough for me to add it to my to read list, and during a night where I could not sleep, I read Maka Maka until 4am.
Maka Maka is an erotica manga. I was kind of tricked by the description. "... It's about having someone who calls you the night of your birthday, when you're feeling down because you just slept with a guy who turned out to be a jerk, and thanks you for being born because she's so happy to have met you. What is Maka-Maka about? It's about Jun and Nene." While I expected it to have NSFW scenes in it, the entirety of it is just.. NSFW with not much else. I can't really understand why people on Twitter were calling it peak fiction.
Some of the moments of tenderness between Nene and Jun are really sweet, but I find it to be overshadowed by the fact that they continue to deal with misognynistic men throughout the manga. They seem to have an understanding of each other that only women can have together, and they know what the other likes. They do seem genuinely in love, and what kept me reading was some hope that they'd stop dating assholes and just get together. Spoilers, they don't.
While they don't get together or have a traditional relationship, I guess it doesn't make their love any less meaningful. They still expect to be in each other's lives forever. It's sweet enough I guess. Not really worth reading if you're not interested in erotica though... I don't regret reading it because I get to add it to my tower of yuri, but I can not deny that I am disappointed.
2023-12-13

I first read Dr. Cataclysm in high school I believe, and a lot of it was lost on me because I'd read manga and comics at 3am in my bedroom as quickly as possible. I also read some of it as it released which made the story even more disjointed for me. I decided to reread it while sitting in the office today, and it was such a delight.
Dr. Cataclysm is about Janos Cola, a man who has been shot by a golden arrow that gives him powers. Well, it's kind of about him. It's really about friendships, people in life not being truly evil- circumstances making them that way, space travel, etcetera. The writing kind of reminds me of Adventure Time. It has a silly feel where things aren't quite logical while also being very sincere. Elements of the worldbuilding are similar as well.
It really did touch my heart and it inspired me quite a bit. The art style has these thick black lines that resemble an ink pen and it's in black and white. The characters have interesting silhouttes and designs despite the style being very simple a lot of the time. Well, deceptively simple. The art gets more complex over time, and the ships look fantastic in the final volumes.
I recommend Dr. Cataclysm. it's free on issue. It's also by Mortis Ghost, the artist and game dev of all time.
2023-12-11

This is a .flow doujinshi. The title on myanilist is .flow Kousatsu so that's what we're going with. .flow Kousatsu is the first time I've read a fanwork in years I believe aside from random sprinkles of chapters from friend's fanfiction. It's not that it completely disinterests me. I just don't find myself actively seeking out content like this. I found it because I asked my friend Bella for their favorite drawings of Smile and she gave me this as she said it had more of him.
It hits a nostalgia factor for me. Aspects of it remind me of my intense Creepypasta phase where I was obsessed with gore and serial killers with poorly written stories. Smile even reminded me of Jeff the Killer, like 2016 version of Jeff the Killer drawn by Creepypasta mansion fanatics. It really made me miss that time in my life.
The story is good, but the way it's told is a bit messy and hard to follow near the end. Perhaps this is due to the translation, but I think it may be the work itself? The mangaka includes a final page explaining exactly what took place in the doujinshi. It cleared things up a bit more.
It kind of piqued my interests regarding fanworks in general. Despite the fact that it's not really an intepretation of the events in .flow and more of the author using .flow's setting and characters as a vehicle for their own ideas, I really did enjoy it (aside from the sistercon jokes (were they jokes?(i don't fucking know))). It manages to get you attached to the characters, and you understand their motivations. The art style is charming and comes from that time on the internet where art was so fun to look at.
And of course it allowed me to see some intepretation of Smile c: What a fun character. He is now in my mind palace.
2023-12-04

I found Swollen to Bursting Until I am Disappearing on Purpose while scrolling through the RPG Maker tag on Tumblr. While I didn't promptly forget about it, it faded to the back of my mind as it wasn't completely finished when I laid my eyes on it. I saw the release trailer, but it faded to the back of my mind again. Finally, my friend Kail sang its praises and I decided to run it on my Steam Deck while skipping classes.
I really liked Swollen to Bursting though I think it has an esoteric quality to it. It has aspects of Yume Nikki fangames, elements of ps2 era games such as Chulip, and it has a lot of bizarre elements that I really enjoyed such as a cow you mix for effects or a party of rats witnessing a murder. The bizarre elements did appeal to me, but I was mostly focused on bits of the characters I could understand. As you milk effects, you can use these effects to solve puzzles or make some parts of the game easier, and more things about the protagonist are revealed to you over time.
I really enjoyed Husband. I wish we knew more about him. There's a readme file (that I actually didn't see for a bit because I wasn't played in a desktop environment) that gives you some details on the characters. It made some things more satisfactory while I wish I'd learned about certain aspects of these characters in game itself.
All in all, I really did like Swollen to Bursting. Just a warning, the game may not work on slower computers as it is really pushing RPG Maker to its limits. I am really curious as to what causes it to chug at times. Perhaps it's the 2.5D plugin? It's the first RPG Maker game I've played that uses the 2.5D plugin. I'd really like to play more.
2023-11-21
It's really weird that it took me so long to sit down and play all of .flow. It might've been because one of my first exposures to Yume Nikki fangames was the wonderful but Large game Yume 2kki. I did play .flow once or twice at various times, but never got very far in either session. I was always worried about how difficult the maps were to navigate since the nexus only have four doors. I worried there were long interconnected worlds that I'd get lost in only for a chaser to wake me up.
I am happy to say .flow is designed in a wonderful way. I find the worlds mostly easy to navigate. Rainbow Maze almost made me quit as I found it rather headache inducing, but luckily I managed to find most everything I needed because I spent so long trying to find every place in it. I checked the wiki only to find that I'd done everything there was to do there.
Anyway, .flow is pretty gory and gross at times so be aware. I really liked that the lolrust (the dev) did not shy away from it, and it really inspired me in my own game dev endevours. It is also one of the few RPG Maker games that managed to make me scream haha. Corrupted Schoolhouse.
The concepts in it are really good and exploring Sabitsuki's/Rust's consciousness leaves a lot of questions. Who is Smile and why (redacted)? Who is Rust? Why the fuck am I being attacked by fetuses? What/who are the cleaners? These questions were fun to discover even if they don't have concrete answers.
2023-11-21

Alien 9 has been in my circle for years. I've been seeing glimpses of it on Tumblr on various aesthetic blogs, artists I follow absolutely love it, and I've seen some claim it has influenced artist such as Tsukumizu. I actually had a lot of thoughts on this manga that I thought of one night, but promptly forgot them, so we are winging it.
Alien 9 has a focus on elementary school girls. They're in the year before middle school. It discusses puberty and growing up in a way that might disturb a lot of people. While lying down at night after reading it, I remembered being in my child body when puberty was starting. When I think of that time now, it's absolutely repulsive to me, and I grieve the body I left behind despite the fact that everyone grows up eventually.
The manga captures that feeling.. That fear of getting older, the responsibilities forced on you that terrify you, your body becoming alien to you, adults completely ignoring your feelings for the sake of responsibilities. I went into it not realizing how depressing it'd be and my own older feelings it'd bring up. I should mention Alien 9 had been described to me as being about "middle school girl problems" which is why I put it off for so many years. It is honestly a lot more than that, and it helped me feel at peace with the child inside me I left behind so long ago. It wasn't just me who was terrified.
To add on, the art and body horror is striking. It's a very beautiful manga. I hope to get a physical copy of it someday because the scans online just aren't that great. I think the anime does a very good job capturing that beauty as well. I wish the entire thing had been animated as I really enjoyed watching it.
The more I think about it.. The more it becomes a favorite. I'm sorry for putting it off for so long.
2023-10-17
18+
I'm doing very bad mentally due to the Anxiety and numerous health issues, so I decided to read A Girl on the Shore by Inio Asano of Goodnight Punpun fame. It didn't tear me apart despite me hoping it would, but I didn't dislike it. It's a very graphic story about a girl having sex with a school friend and the emotional turmoils that come with it. It was actually way more graphic than I thought it'd be considering the subject matter (though it could've been far worse). I'm trying to figure out what to write.
When we're young, we do a lot of bad things to other people without realizing what our motivations are. We often don't choose kindness and have to learn it is a path we can choose as we age. It can require a catalyst for us to choose this path. Sometimes, by the time we realize it is an option, the relationship we cherish has been severed.
But even if the relationship has been severed, at least they affected you in some way. It sucks to look back on the grief you may have caused them, but at least you won't knowingly hurt anyone else the way you did them.
2023-10-11

Monster Girl Rechan is a one shot. You might've seen images of a girl with a bug mouth for a face.. This is where it originates.
It’s always kind of weird when people are nice to you because something is obviously wrong with you. It can take a while to notice at first. Everyone being nice to you makes you so happy, but then you notice no one calls you. No one texts you. They smile at you when you see them in person. They compliment your clothes, they share their art with you.. but they don’t really care about you. You’re still lonely.
I really enjoyed Monster Girl Rechan, but it made me sadder than most one-shots make me. But I always love when something like this ends up making me sad.
2023-08-17
18+
Sexual Liberation, The Shape of Each Love 18+ is a manga I read a few days ago. There was a list on tumblr talking about lesbian manga authors and this one was mentioned. I really dislike the cover of this haha... >_>. Just gonna let you know that guy on the cover is interested in her romantically but nothing happens between the two of them because she is a lesbian and he is a Nice Person. Not sure why the mangaka put him right there LOL.
Sexual Liberation The Shape of Each Love is about an older woman in an office in a relationship with her coworker. It's not a very well-written love story, but it does tackle things like discrimination in the workplace and the perspective of people who tend to stay away from all LGBT issues until they realize it affects them. It's pretty hopeful and has a cute ending. It is 18+ though if that isn't obvious
2023-06-25

Convenience Store Woman was.. A comforting read? I guess? I'm not sure if that's the right word. The main character, Keiko, is obviously autistic, and the way she thinks about the world is similar to how I think about the world which I really enjoyed. But it also made me really sad. People cannot live peacefully in this world if they do not align with certain expectations, especially if they are women. They will always be seen as outsiders.
I'm curious as to how most people read this book, considering its popularity. Did they view Keiko as strange or as alien too? Especially regarding the social expectation aspect. It's interesting because birth rates are falling in Japan and NEETdom is on the rise. More people probably relate to it- the feeling of not being normal enough to fit in society. But that can't be the entire audience of the book right?
I can't completely wrap my head around why a large review called it heartwarming. It just reminds me of the fact that time is running out for people like me. What if I don't find my own convenient store after college? I guess it's comforting because she has the convenience store, and she's accepted that that's what she wants to live as.. but... a lot of us aren't finding places like that. We are idling.
2023-06-25
18+
Lol, okay so, when someone was telling me about this book, they accidentally described the plot of the wrong book to me, so I read this thinking something else would happen. Well, lol, surprise surprise, I get written sadomasochistic mentally ill lesbianism. I misread the author's name as Erica rather than Eric and assumed the writer was a woman, but the entire time felt like I was reading a story by someone who waas not a lesbian. Got to the end and realized it was a guy and realized reading at 5am probably wasn't the best decision.
It was really gross and had random descriptions that were there just to shock you or to go "oh she's sooo mentally ill look at this terrible thing" and it just really bothered me. There's one scene I absolutely despised because I just didn't think it belonged in the book. It was there just to be shocking.
Pregnancy is a theme in the book, and honestly, when I was reading I just kept thinking "this feels like it was not written by a lesbian." It results in a major plotpoint that is interesting but like... Idk. Everything in the book just "suddenly" happens it feels like and there isn't a lot of a character development. It doesn't feel like their relationship really forms- it kind of just begins. I guess it can be a reflection of Agnes's mental state allowing her to fall for someone so quickly. And Zoe just being a shitty person... I guess. I want to give the author the benefit of the doubt but if you're going to write lesbians, maybe don't write about one of us wanting to get pregnant...
2023-06-25

Note: Weight Loss / ED Talk
I really enjoyed Cousin. I think it succeeded in many of the areas In Clothes Called Fat failed in despite the fact that the main character's disordered behavior isn't nearly as extreme- she doesn't really have eating disorder from what I can tell. I will explain.
This story focuses on a girl who is fat at the beginning. She is pretty okay with her life despite people making a lot of comments on her weight and viewing as herself as average. She has slipped to an "average" role in life. She has a cousin who's very successful, beautiful, and thin which is why it's called Cousin.
She forms a crush on a man and loses weight to be a "better" version of herself for him, but I hesitate to say that he is the main she lost weight. I honestly think that there was another character in the manga who had a huge influence on how she viewed herself. A friend. He just wants her to improve and be beautiful and in his mind her improvement = losing weight. He seems to view bettering a woman's self as being a more attractive version of themselves. I really wanted to kill him. He's an interesting character because I think he reflects a lot of the people we can meet in life who don't realize how their comments are really ruining how we view ourselves.
The manga I think has a lot of commentary on how women exist and how people perceive them. I think the girlfriend of Shiro, who I can't remember the name of at the moment, is an obvious of example of this based on a the chapters she's prevalent in. I really liked the way she was written.
Good manga. I enjoyed it. Finally some good food. I just wish the ending had been slightly different. It was so close to being great, but I definitely this manga to people who enjoy post adolescence focused work / manga about relationships with food.
2023-06-18

Note: I talk in depth about eating disorders here, so don't read if this will trigger you!
I read In Clothes Called Fat while on a train ride. Very unpleasant read while going past pretty things. Not unpleasant in a poorly written way though. In Clothes Called Fat is about a girl with an eating disorder. She binges on food and gains weight and experiences other behaviors throughout the manga. I.. wasn't really ready to read this. I mostly found this manga because I saw a picture of lesbians in it on Tumblr and I thought "wow that are style is nice and I would really like to read about lesbians." The lesbians are only in a few panels but I don't regret reading it or anything.
As someone with eating disordered behaviors (I hesitate to say I have a full blown eating disorder), I always find media about eating disorders to be really interesting also triggering. Despite the havoc stories like this wreak on my mental state, I can't help but seek them out and consume them. In Clothes Called Fat is my least favorite of the stories about eating disorders I've consumed though... It's a very miserable read. A girl is treated terribly for her appearance by others, but I felt at times it was far too dramatized for me to really.. Feel like I was getting any insight in the life of a fat person which isn't a surprise. Myanilist said one of the tags was "drama." I just found it a bit disappointing. When the protagonist loses weight, I found the overdramatization of how people treated her when she was thin to hold the story back as well.
Of course, most eating disorder stories are dramatized (or even romanticized) if they aren't in the style of a documentary so it isn't like.. surprising. It's just.. There's a girl who gets an entire scam pinned on this girl and everyone around her just agrees to it which kind of ruins her life. Her boyfriend is such a pathetic man. Her coworkers are terrible except for one girl who is very eccentric but I struggle to identify her purpose in the story (though she was very cute and fun to watch despite the fact that her life also seemed to get ruined.)
I think one theme in the story is that people will treat you poorly whether you're fat or thin and there's negative sides to both. You will never be completely happy on either side, but it feels especially weird to read with my perspective. As someone who hangs out in eating disorder spaces and sees what people from various BMIs have to say when their weight fluctuates, many people at a higher BMI remark that they notice a lot of changes in how people treat them when they're at a lower BMI. I'd like to see Moyoco Anno's personal thoughts on this story.
In the end the most painful part is that the protagonist never really gets the help she needs. Perhaps I wasn't supposed to get much out of the story other than just looking at the life of someone in poor circumstances who believes that being a certain weight will fix those problems. And the circumstances are just so dire that there isn't much a change whether she is thin or fat.
2023-05-21

Thera 1 is a story by Kyou Systems, someone I've interacted with quite a few times. They're a very pleasant person.
It's very short. It took me about 10 minutes to read.. It was made with Love2d which was fun to get running on the steam deck. I don't think there's a lot of love2d fans x linux users. Okay sorry for rambling. I discuss game now.
The vibes were immaculate. The artwork, sound effects, and music melded perfectly together to create the feeling of a surreal radio station. I really love surreal stories. The plot wasn't really revealed in this but the characters were introduced a little bit. I'd like to say more, but as I mentioned it is quite short. I'm excited to see read 2, whenever that comes to frution!
2023-04-24

I read Memories of Emanon and Emanon Wanderer. My feelings regarding this is that the first 8 chapter part, Memories of Emanon, was very powerful. It left a very strong impression on me, and I had a delightful time reading it. The artwork is honestly some of my favorite I've seen. The story concept also appeals to me a lot in some ways and disinterests me in others.
Emanon Wanderer left less of an impression on me. I read it and felt it would be better suited for a novel. Sometimes, I felt that the way information was relayed could've been much cleaner though this seemed to be slightly acknowledged in the afterword as well. It felt a bit messy... Many moments would've been much more impactful if the story had been less fragmented. I also feel some of the appeal of Memories of Emanon is the ephemeralness of it, and I feel as though Emanon Wanderer doesn't quite capture that feeling though it attempts to.
I definitely recommend reading Memories of Emanon as I think it stands on its own and perhaps reading Emanon Wanderer if you want to see Ema doing more things. I feel there are moments of genius in it- they're just a bit obscured by everything else. The art continues to be beautiful though. Honestly, it might be worth reading for the art alone.
2023-04-05

I read menhera-chan. The mangaka wrote it when she was 15, and redrew a lot of it over the course of two years and finished when she was 17. I didn't know this before starting, but it makes a lot of sense knowing it now.
It's about a mentally ill girl named Menhera and her friends. One of her friends has physical issues and an obsession with BL. Her other friend is very normal. The manga begins with the 4-koma silly comics I dislike, but I quickly began to warm up to it. Some of it was relatable to me as a mentally ill person on meds, but what really got me into the story was the slow growth and progression of the characters.
The art was also really cute... I should mention that the mangaka passed away at a young age. I wish I could've seen more stories from her. I hope wherever she is, she is resting peacefully.
2023-03-24

I finally finished The Rust Maidens on my plane ride back home. It was recommended to me by my friend Zed (thanks Zed!), and the first work of hopefully many I've read by Gwendolyne Kiste. It's an exploration of a women's trauma after she has watched her friends slowly turn into Something Else. It almost made me cry on the plane haha.
The women in this book were very good.. The way it explores what it is like being a woman in a place that's slowly dying... It also felt like it reached me a bit more
2023-03-05

I looved She Loves to Cook and She Loves to Eat. It's been impossible for me to find good yuri recently. I feel as though I've read most of it. At one point I picked up a manga about a girl who falls in love with her older sister in law (i had a feeling it'd be bad, but i was really hoping it'd be.. some profound work about lesbianism. no. it was just straight man yuri cringe)
She Loves to Cook is a manga I knew was very good. I've known about it for months, maybe even years now. I just put off reading it because it was ongoing, and reading ongoing things gives me hives. I finally picked it up, and reading it called me to experience euphoria. I forgot how good it feels to read something by a lesbian catered towards lesbians that sparks warm feelings. It also talks about food. I love food. I love stories about food and eating.
The woman who loves to eat, Kasuga.. What a woman!!! She carries Nomoto's bag, she eats her food, the way she ties her hair bakc into a ponytail., her lack of reaction to things, the way she knows what she wants in life, she works out, she is so ready to go along with things suggested by nomoto.. she's such a dream.... wait i'm supposed to be talking about the manga not drooling over.. kasuga.. sorry..|
BUT REALLY. this manga is made for lesbians. THE MANGAKA GETS IT. SHE GETS IT SO MUCH. it also discusses some of the pains of being a woman. i think female readers could really take a lot from it- even if they aren't lesbians. it's just such a delight.
it also made me so lonely.. i wish i had a girlfriend...
2023-03-01

Okay. Okay so. I need to talk about My Love Story again. I always think about coming back to manga but this is the first time I truly felt Compelled.
I want to give it more credit. The type of masculinity written in My Love Story is something I've never seen before, and the love between Suna and Takeo makes me really happy. I genuinely think it's one of the the best friendships I've seen in a manga... I used one of the panels I look at regularly for this so you can Understand. It makes me feel a way I rarely feel.. I wanted to acknowledge that before moving on. I really am happy I read My Love Story despite me thinking I wouldn't care for it very much originally. It did reach me.
2023-02-20

Wow! My Love Story? A story with a heterosexual romance! I'm really stepping out of my boundaries.. Hahaha. Well, I can't quite remember what caused me to pick this up. I guess I was intrigued by the premise of a stereotypically unattractive protagonist falling in love. It was a cute little read and exactly what I expected. I'd complain if I had expected it to be any better.
It's the average high school romance with the the very bizarre plot points that come out of nowhere to keep the story interesting. It made me realize I think I prefer slow burns... Or maybe not slow burns but.. I like when the romance happens a bit more gradually... The protagonist gets with the romantic interest very quickly and at first I thought, "ah high school romance" and expected it to just last in high school but.. They stay together throughout the entire manga.
The protagonist is very lovable. He has a desire to be manly, yet lacks the toxic masculinity part. The girls are cute without being sexualized. Some of the characters are interesting while others are a step away from moe blobs. There's a character who's a bit creepy but I can't help but being entertained by him.. It seems like the mangaka read Jojo and thought "I have got to put one of these fuckers in my manga." He's memorable and his arc was kind of funny even if it was a bit strange. I like his flavor of mental instability.
I think if you like silly romance you will enjoy this.. It's not compelling at all though... I got to chapter 13 and thought about dropping it but.. I was.. In love with Sunakawa. I know I just said the manga wasn't very compelling but his friendship with Takeo really kept me going. It was such a delight- I just wanted to keep reading. Some people consider him aromantic which is very fun. He's an attractive boy who girls love but he completely lacks interest in them. In fact, romance seems to make him uncomfortable though he makes sacrifices for Takeo. I have my favorite panel of him saved and I sent it to my friend who I thought would say the same thing to me if I was sad.
The manga also got quite a few laughs out of me.. It made me want to read more things classified as comedy. I recommend it even if I consider a bit boring! It wasn't a drag and if you like silly high school romance and want something that doesn't feel like it's written by a creep, this is good.
2023-02-19

I was scrolling through Instagram and saw a video playing a vocaloid song over a panel of a boy crying listening to music. I thought "well I want to be miserable" and sought out the manga! Surprise surprise, it's a one-shot collaboration behind the creator of Chainsaw Man and mangaka who is creating a manga called "To the Strip of Flesh" (I had never heard of this but perhaps I will read it.).
It was a read about overintepreting the simplistic... As someone who definitely likes to look way too far into things, I find it entertaining, but also, it's really FUN analyzing media until there is Nothing left to analyze even if the author didn't intend for it to be read that way. Of course, you have to think about the fact that this is by the creator of Chainsaw Man, probably the most popular manga at the moment about a boy who is part chainsaw. It's acclaimed for it's genius while others tear it down for being just another shonen manga. Make of that what you will.
2023-02-19

1.31.23
This is an 18+ entry. I'VE BEEN FOOLED. I'VE BEEN BAMBOOZLED. Also sorry for two 18+ entries so close together haha.
Bad Thought Diary... It was supposed to be a cute manga about a friend having a sex dream about her friend and realizing she's in love with her!! and it FOOLED ME. It was that at first, but you know what.. It's my fault. I didn't read the big drama tag, but you know.. I didn't expect the drama to be.. So bad.
Like.. GIIRL. GIIIIRL. YOU KNOW HOW MUCH OF THIS COULD'VE BEEN AVOIDED IF THE PROTAGONIST WASN'T An idiot? OR IF YUNA JUST LEARNED TO SMACK SOMEONE!!!! Oh my god. Oh my god. Drama can be really well done I feel, but it was just really poorly written here. Especially considering the person causing all of this drama is just a manipulative college student.
I read like 31 chapters of this but there was such a dumb plotpoint that I had to drop it. I couldn't do it anymore. It's not fair.
And you know I expected it to be better because I'm pretty sure the artist is a lesbian, but there's like a borderline rape scene that happens and you know.. It was really disturbing. Can't trust anyone to write yuri and be normal about it i guess.
Sorry this is probably the most ineloquent and ranty thing I've written so far. I really was disappointed by this manwha. It's the first thing I read this year, and I just really wanted cute lesbian content. I'm going to download a bunch of lesbian visual novels to my steam deck and it will fix me. 1.2.23
Hello darlings! It's the New Year! Well it was. Four minutes ago. Now it's officially the 2nd. Anyway, gonna about my thoughts on HEARTLOVEPOWERTEMPLE. Yaaay.
I actually read this a few months ago... Many months ago.... Not sure when exactly. Anyway! My friend Zed and I were talking about it because he just finished it, and I decided it'd be fun to write about it. I'm going to start with praise.
The artwork is beautiful. It is illustrated and written by yogurt200.. I was most excited to see all the sprites and backgrounds and it did not disappoint! The music was also lovely. I still remember my favorite tracksmonths later.. Not sure what the title was but I Remember it.
Hmm... My main memory of HEARTLOVEPOWERTEMPLE is a big critique I had. It has been bothering me for quite some time and talking about it with Zed has resulted in me writing this entry.
I think.. A core of theme of HEARTLOVEPOWERTEMPLE is friendship, love, and devotion, but.. There is a character who suffers throughout the visual novel, and I could only describe as bizarre and painful to read (because it was well written and it sucks to see a character you like suffer.) I have to avoid saying some things because of spoilers, but I will leave you with this.
One important theme in Revolutionary Girl Utena is the unnecessary suffering within society, and how you should not play a part of it. Have you read Those Who Walk Away from the Omelas? You've probably heard about it at least... A utopian city that relies on the suffering of a child.. There are other important stories that talk about how figures in power causing suffering for the good of the world. Those stories often leave you thinking about the state of our society you know..
,
But it feels like the characters' causing this character's suffering are framed as the ultimate good. yogurt200 plans to write other stories in this world, and I'm hoping we get some more expanding on the characters' because it really bothered me. It also felt like the friends of this character just.. Didn't have a very big reaction to all of it. (I'm trying to avoid spoilers), and it's.. So strange in a story full of love. When I got to the end, this plot point kind of.. Ruined it for me. Perhaps one reason is that it reminds of actual religious abuse tactics.. But this time, it's literally caused by an actual god... And that's quite frightening.
Now, these moments are written as horrifying which leads to me to hope that perhaps the characters' that cause the suffering.. might be horrifying rather than framed as good. It's just hard to tell because the main characters just don't seem to criticize them at all. In theory, you could see it's a masterful writing of how religious abuse effects people, but unfortunately, I don't think that's the case based on the ending. I could be wrong though. We'll have to see in future works.
I still think it's a good piece of work despite this thing bothering me so much that I've been mulling it over for months. I really like unique fantasy worlds, and I'm hoping at some point in her next work this thing that happened is addressed in some way. I need the goddess's actions and feelings about this situation to be talked about....
Anyway this took about six hours to read? So I tried to avoid all plotpoints even using the word goddess is a bit of a way to avoid spoiling a plotpoint. And be aware, I still really like this VN. I even drew one of the main characters'! I would not write about it this many months later if I did not like it <3 1.2.23
This is an 18+ entry. The title is "Fucking Trans Women" #0. The author passed away recently as a result of cancer. Rest in peace. I wish I’d been able to speak to you.
For some time now, I’ve been feeling a strange repulsion by sex. I think it’s the result of pornography depicting the same acts over and over again. Porn scares me. It looks like no one is having fun, and sometimes, people are obviously being hurt. I associated penetration with violence, being bare in the presence of another human being as distressing, and I decided I’d never let anyone come near me. I knew in theory there was love in sexual acts, but it just seemed so vile to me.
It’s probably obvious I have some trauma as well, but honestly, it feels hard to find a girl without trauma in this world of ours. Why would I view an act of passion as something that could be good when it is often depicted as a tool for dominance and violence? Often, the earliest exposure many humans in the 20th century have to sex is through pornography.. And I think that’s so terrible.
This zine really made me see some things clearly. I struggle to put my thoughts into words without revealing too much about myself, but this zine made me love my own body more. I love the human body, all bodies, even if I am afraid of them. And this increased my love so much more. Mira Bellwether’s description of her own body led me to thinking about my own. It feels like cracks in the shell I’ve grown to separate myself from other people have bits of light shining through. Maybe it would be worth it? To connect with someone in that way?
I am still afraid of others, but at least I find beauty in pleasure.
The art and writing of trans women is always astounding me. I love you all dearly, and you continue to make me love myself and you with everything you create. You are in my heart. Once again, rest in peace Mira Bellwether.12.26.22
I am now trying to exit the depression coccoon I've embedded myself in, and the first step towards doing that is by reading.. I think. I haven't updated in almost a month haha. Anyway, Usuzumi No Hate! There's only 8 chapters, but I think I've read enough to have a solid opinion of it.
Usuzumi No Hate is another post apocolyptic manga. Rather than the folly of humans resulting in their end, it was aliens. I had a conversation with my friend Zed about this manga so I will be paraphrasing a lot of what we talked about.
I really want to love Usuzumi No Hate. The art is lovely and unique. The cross hatching is gorgeous, and it's one of those manga that try to have interesting things to say about the human condition.
There are poignant moments. Chapter five has a scene that did make me feel the desperation the author was trying to get across...
I hate to compare manga, but it kind of reminds me of Girl's Last Tour but not as good. Each chapter has its own storyline that is supposed to make the reader think, but the protagonist of Usuzumi No Hate is very quiet. Quiet storytelling can be really effective, but I just don't think it works very well in this story specifically.
In Girl's Last Tour, Chi and and Yuuri talk to each other often though there is often silence as well... It's a very nice balance. The protagonist of Usuzumi No Hate kind of just.. She sometimes reacts but it just feels.. Empty. She has the ability to express empathy. She carries around a tiny pet with her. She sometimes experiences sadness or shock, but she doesn't really say anything. I really like quiet protagonists and I do like this character, but I think the manga really would benefit from some of her insight.
Also I really dislike chapter 4. I have to admit it likely lowered my opinion of the manga a bit. I skimmed some of the other chapters before writing this, and despite my criticisms, I think it's a fine piece of media and I will continue reading it unless something happens that makes me dislike it. And if you haven't read anything like Girl's Last Tour, it's nice introduction to this kind of media. Girl's Last Tour does what this manga is trying to do much better, but if you like that story, you'll probably like this one.12.21.22
I read Welcome to NHK and had an interesting conversation with my friend about it about it because it's.. A unique piece of media with critical acclaim.. Though I'm aware some people consider the manga the worst adaptation.
Originally, I did not like Welcome to NHK at all. It was not what I expected. This was until Misaki got further development. Her development really peaked my interest. I can't really say what the deal with her is without spoilers, but in the conversation I mentioned earlier I said "I really can’t imagine her being written differently and still ~enjoying~ Welcome to NHK."
Welcome to NHK isn't also completely aimed at me as a girl who doesn't consider themself deep in otaku culture, but at some point I was a NEET. It was absolutely miserable. I grew fearful of leaving my house. Once, my friend invited me out and all day I thought about cancelling because I was so scared something would go wrong.
I would still be a NEET if I didn't get scholarships to go to college, and sometimes, the lifestyle calls back to me... The comforting but suffocating feeling of living in your room playing games and watching anime or playing dating sims for days on end... It sounds heavenly at times even though I know for me, it only leads to misery. I know if college doesn't work out, I'll likely end up in that place again.
Some parts of Welcome to NHK really felt like looking into a distorted mirror. It wasn't quite me, but it was someone I could've been.11.22.22
Hm, this was one of the most miserable pieces of media I've read. It really.. hurts. To think about what abuse did to you. Could I have been a better person if I hadn't met you? What would I be like if I hadn't been told that particular thing when I was younger? Am I missing love? Should I love you? I still think about you all the time even after what you did to me. I was hoping you'd get mad at me and end it all. Let me tell my final lie.
I really wanted to be killed by you. And.. Honestly, I still love you after all this time. I wish you could stop making me so miserable. I hate you so much.11.14.22
I picked this up from the ShortBox Comics Fair. It made me so sad. I try to avoid things that are this sad, but I was a fool. The art just looked so beautiful in the previews Hana Chatani posted on twitter. I wanted to buy and consume it... I felt the characters' grief. It's been days since I read it and I still feel it now. It's a carefully thought out story and very well told. If you get the chance to pick it up, (I have no idea when Chatani will release this again now that this ShortBox Comics Fair is over) I recommend it! 11.6.22
Shimeji Simulation is by the mangaka of girl's last tour, so i expected it to be good, and well it was. it took a moment for me to warm up to it. i've never been to fond of manga in the 4 koma style.. the only other one i've read is Poor Poor Lips and that was years ago.
I had a little theory about Shimeji Simulation that was proved true in the last few chapters which brings me a lot of joy. a story which can be predicted has laid its groundwork rather well. the characters in shimeji simulation are all enjoyable. Shijima's older sister.. I think about her frequently.
Shimeji Simulation isn't finished yet, so expect me to come back to this one. 10.30.22
Another post apocolyptic work. This one really reached me. It's more "We are living our daily lives at the end of the world," but unlike Yokohama Kaidashi Kikuo, this has tragedy.. The art in this is beautiful. The mangaka really gets across that they are exploring the end of the world. The setting is very fascinating as well. It takes place in a city with multiple levels with interesting technology. I really like Ishii. The chapter Oblivion really reached me. It caused me to feel a great sadness. I'll definitely come back to this manga and write a longer page on it one of these days.10.9.22
I really enjoyed Uzumaki. I hate to sound like I am repeating myself but it is now one of my favorites. It was an interesting read as a psychotic person (I realize this was unintentional. I will probably write about it). It was also horrifying. There was one image in here that shocked me. I'll just say it was in the hospital chapter.
I'm really excited for the anime next year. I want to say more, but.. Psychosis write up coming eventually!!! 10.9.22
I really liked this manga. It is now one of my favorites of all time. It's a post apocolypse work (genre I love) about an android running a cafe. It's a very beautiful work with an air of melancholia I adore. The characters age and you relate to them losing their childhood as they grow older. The character Alpha is wonderful though my favorite was Kokone. I found her relatable. There's also another reason she's my favorite which is probably very obvious if you read the manga haha.
Anyway, the beauty of the end of the world really shines through. It's something I love. This made me want to read more things like this.... Maybe I will read Girl's Last Tour next or pick Nausicaa back up.10.4.22
I reread My Lesbian Experience with Loneliness yesterday. It feels more relevant to me than last time I read it now that I am working and in school and my complete lack of understanding of how to socialize is really crippling my life. Kabi Nagata's relationship with gender continues to be relatable to me, and the desire to be held by an older mature woman.. I understand T_T To feel comfortable and safe..
It was really uncomfortable to read, in a good way (this is true of all of Kabi Nagata's works). There's a lot of pain in this manga and I hope it helps people understand the agony of mental illness. There was a part in it about looking for a place to belong. She turned to work for this.. At my old job, my manager said we spend more time with each other than we do with family. Isn't that interesting to think about? I feel really stressed when thinking about relationships at work. I think that's probably why. 10.3.22
The manga Our Dreams at Dusk: Shimanami Tasogare has been on my reading list forever. I was just craving another manga with LGBTQ themes and wow, I'm really happy I read this one. Our Dreams at Dusk is about gay people renovating buildings (this is a simplification). It has a very honest depiction of people of different identities supporting each other throughout each other's lives. I felt seen by the character Anonymous (I believe she is called Someone in the official English release). It felt like the author had looked into my heart and made a character especially for me. This means there's other people on Earth who understand Anonymous (including the writer). There's other people like me in this world. It makes me want to cry.10.1.22
Another manga by Ebine Yamaji! I read it last night. Indigo Blue is a story about cheating. There is no way around it. It really makes you dislike the protagonist, Rutsu. There are other reasons to dislike the protagonist as well, but I think Ebine Yamaji is well aware of this. It was an interesting read. The love interest of Rutsu is very likable to me though you know very little about her. I wish we'd been able to spend more time with her.
I always enjoy reading Yamaji's work because it reaffirms that I am a lesbian. The way she describes her character's feelings are so relatable to me. Seeing how a lesbian navigates her relationship with a man while having a lover on the side was fascinating even if it was a bit painful.I'll probably reread it again in the future. 9.22.22
I read Junji Ito's Cat Diary a few months ago. It was so cute. So cute. Oh god I love cats. I'm a dog person, and so is Junji Ito, but this manga really made me fall in love with those little creatures. Junji Ito's wife is funny and the illustrations of her never failed to make me laugh. The cats, Yon and Muu, are the most adorable creatures. It's always fun to see their personalities. 9.22.22
Daily Jojo is a webcomic by Donggeon Lee, the creator of one of my favorite comics, Yumi's Cells. I've been reading it for a while. Embarrassingly enough, I must admit one of the cliff hangers got me and I spent 99 cents to see the next chapter. It was worth it. Something I'd long been waiting for happened and I shouted "that's what i've been waiting for!!!!!" It was so exciting for me. I really love Donggeon Lee. He's a fantastic writer.
I haven't even mentioned what it's about. It's about the friendship of Eunjo Lee, a messy office worker, and Wan Jo, a very put together office worker. They rub off on each other. I really connected with Wan Jo and feel for him. Both characters are really likable. I wish I could read it nonstop all the time. The chapters are at a nice sweetspot9.21.22
I really enjoy Belzebubs. I read bits of it on Instagram a few years ago though Instagram just isn't very great for reading webcomics.. I lost track of where I was because it's Instagram. Anyways, the creator has been uploading it to webtoon. It brings me a lot of joy. While I'm not a satanist, I am goth so seeing these goth-adjacent characters living their happy horrific lives brings me a lot of joy. It's one of the few slice of life works I enjoy. 9.21.22
Love My Life is a manga with a lot of gay people and a likeable straight character. It is the first work I read by Ebine Yamaji, and I think of it fondly. I actually watched the movie first, and they're very similar.. There's aspects of both I like more than the other. The worst thing is that the movie it does not depict Take-chan's boyfriend.. And also... I feel like the movie makes Ichiko a bit too blameless in one situation. If you watch the movie or read the manga, you might know what I'm referring too.
I think Ebine Yamaji has a thing for lesbian skinheads. 9.20.22
I read Free Soul yesterday, so this is fresh on my mind. I really like Ebine Yamaji's stories. Partially because she seems to really enjoy drawing black characters. It sparks a lot of joy. She always does a really good job too!! But the main reason I got into her work is because I was searching for yuri with adult characters.
My feelings regarding Free Soul.. I enjoyed her other work Love My Life a more. The characters in this story were likeable, and the story itself was solid, but.. I disliked the ending. It felt like I needed a bit more to time to justify it.9.20.22
Chainsaw Man was a really good read. I read it because I saw Dorohedoro fans talk about it, and I love Dorohedoro!! The title is literal!! It's the tale of a chainsaw man. I'm really looking forward to the anime coming this fall. I'm curious how they'll deal with how fast paced it is. There were pages of action much like Dorohedoro. I'm excited to see Power on screen. Did you know I actually drew Power a few months ago? I should add it to the gallery.
I got a bit off topic. I think Chainsaw Man has very interesting things to say about love. It is a core theme. I also really enjoyed the twists and turns of Chainsaw Man. It was really difficult for me to predict what would happen next. Sometimes... I think of the ending and go "haha what was that?"9.20.22
My Wandering Warrior Existence... I read this a few months ago. I found it on the shelf at Barnes and Noble and spent the last of my money of it as a big Kabi Nagata fan. It really made me think about marriage and what it means to me. As someone who struggles with interpersonal relationships and can't imagine using a dating app or trying to pick someone up at a bar, it really reached me. The discussion of gender also made me laugh as someone who also doesn't really have the energy to think about gender.
There's also a rather description of csa in this manga just as a warning to anyone interested in reading it. There's a warning in the manga itself and a page to skip to. I'd like to write about the first books in Kabi Nagata's series after I reread them.9.20.2022
I really like Kabi Nagata and enjoy all of her works. Of her work, this is my least favorite one though contains the quote "To Japanese people, alcohol is alcohol" which made me laugh.
I always feel a deep sadness reading Kabi Nagata's work. This did not evoke that deep sadness for me. I believe Nagata was struggling with how to approach writing about her personal life, and she discusses it in this manga. It really shows in the writing.9.20.22
I started The Guy She Was Interested In Wasn't A Guy At All a few days ago. It's cute. I used to read lots of yuri in high school, so reading this was a nice throwback to that time in my life. The updates are really short. It reminds me of reading old school webcomics. The title really explains the premise. Girl meets a guy, forms a crush, and Surprise! The guy is actually an androgynous girl. I have no strong feelings about it really. 9.20.22
Yumi's Cells was a webtoon by the artist Donggeon Lee. I read throughout high school. It was a refresher. I'm really fond of stories about adults. I think modern day media has a strange fixation on youth, so seeing Donggeon's work about office workers makes me very happy.
You go through the life of Yumi and her cells. Her cells represent her various emotions such as love, lust, hunger. It taught me some things about love. It ended during my senior year of high school, and I was so happy to reach the conclusion but grieved over my comfort webtoon no longer updating.9.19.22
It has been many years since I read My Little Monster. At first I thought I was a freshman in high school, but it's worse than that. I must've been in my second or third year of middle school. I remember reading it on the computers in my creative writing class. I based my emotions on Shizuku Mitzuni's.. I don't think I can ever reread this manga as it is definitely not as good as I remember. I tried to once, and the rape threat in the first volume made me close it forever. Middle school me loved the characters because they reminded me of myself. I'd never seen a slice of life manga with such extreme degrees of mental illness. I'd never seen protagonists quite like Shizuku and Haru. It felt like they were placed in the wrong genre, but for me, it felt like home.
I still have some of the pages from My Little Monster saved on my tumblr and they remind me of the feelings I felt in middle school. The endless loneliness, the days repeating, my disconnect from others. I can't bring myself to read My Little Monster again, but some part of me still believes there are sparks of genius in that strange manga. 9.19.22
I read My Heart is A Chainsaw while on my way to college. It was part of my aspiration to read more books as I was an avid reader as a child but fell off... This was an exciting start. The book quickly engrossed me. The protagonist is an indigenous girl named Jade living in a gentrifying town. She has an obsession with slasher filmns and the events in her life seem to be mirroring that of one of her films. The question is: is she delusional or is the world around her really that of a horror flick? It was a long read, but I read it nonstop over the course of 4 days.. On car rides, in amusement park lines, at restaurants. I hope to read more by Stephen Graham Jones. It's part of a trilogy actually. The next book is already out.. If I had money I'd buy it. 9.19.22
I think I read Sweet Home during my senior year of high school or maybe sometime afterwards. It was a very good read, and I'd recommend it to anyone who wants to start reading webtoons. It makes you understand Why people spend so much money on fastpasses. The cliff hangers are good, the characters are very well-written. The story is excellent. My primary issue with it is that it is a bit short. The conclusion made me wish for more.. I need to reread it.9.19.22
2023-01-31

Hanamonogatari (Hana Monogatari?) has one chapter out, so I probably should've waited to write this, but it was such a delightful read that I really wanted to share it.
First! I really love old women in media! I mean I love older characters in media in general but especially older women (my favorite characters in Ghibli movies are often the old women). I saw this and lost my fucking mind haha.
Hanamonogatari is a girl's love manga about an elderly woman who has just lost her husband finding joy in another woman who does her makeup. I don't want to spoil anything, but it was exciting to see the old lady be.. Such a lesbian (or bi woman). Finding another woman and realizing immediately how lovely she is.
The woman's inner dialogue is funny. It's stuff I'd probably think as an old woman (and some stuff I think about now as I worry about aging.) There was one specific thing that made me laugh as it's something I often think about now. Also the way her husband is characterized really makes you love this woman more.
The love interest is really... Oh god I love her despite not seeing her for too long. I won't say why but you will probably like her too! I'm so excited to see this manga continue. It's just such a delight. I was having a rough day then read this, and it really just put a pep in my step.
My main critique is that.. At times I feel like the characters should look older than they are! I understand their designs though as someone who draws. I think they still read as elderly women most of the time.
If you like romance or are looking for an older protagonist, please read this manga!!!!
2023-01-31

Hello darlings! It's the New Year! Well it was. Four minutes ago. Now it's officially the 2nd. Anyway, gonna about my thoughts on HEARTLOVEPOWERTEMPLE. Yaaay.
I actually read this a few months ago... Many months ago.... Not sure when exactly. Anyway! My friend Zed and I were talking about it because he just finished it, and I decided it'd be fun to write about it. I'm going to start with praise.
The artwork is beautiful. It is illustrated and written by yogurt200.. I was most excited to see all the sprites and backgrounds and it did not disappoint! The music was also lovely. I still remember my favorite tracksmonths later.. Not sure what the title was but I Remember it.
Hmm... My main memory of HEARTLOVEPOWERTEMPLE is a big critique I had. It has been bothering me for quite some time and talking about it with Zed has resulted in me writing this entry.
I think.. A core of theme of HEARTLOVEPOWERTEMPLE is friendship, love, and devotion, but.. There is a character who suffers throughout the visual novel, and I could only describe as bizarre and painful to read (because it was well written and it sucks to see a character you like suffer.) I have to avoid saying some things because of spoilers, but I will leave you with this.
One important theme in Revolutionary Girl Utena is the unnecessary suffering within society, and how you should not play a part of it. Have you read Those Who Walk Away from the Omelas? You've probably heard about it at least... A utopian city that relies on the suffering of a child.. There are other important stories that talk about how figures in power causing suffering for the good of the world. Those stories often leave you thinking about the state of our society you know..
,
But it feels like the characters' causing this character's suffering are framed as the ultimate good. yogurt200 plans to write other stories in this world, and I'm hoping we get some more expanding on the characters' because it really bothered me. It also felt like the friends of this character just.. Didn't have a very big reaction to all of it. (I'm trying to avoid spoilers), and it's.. So strange in a story full of love. When I got to the end, this plot point kind of.. Ruined it for me. Perhaps one reason is that it reminds of actual religious abuse tactics.. But this time, it's literally caused by an actual god... And that's quite frightening.
Now, these moments are written as horrifying which leads to me to hope that perhaps the characters' that cause the suffering.. might be horrifying rather than framed as good. It's just hard to tell because the main characters just don't seem to criticize them at all. In theory, you could see it's a masterful writing of how religious abuse effects people, but unfortunately, I don't think that's the case based on the ending. I could be wrong though. We'll have to see in future works.
I still think it's a good piece of work despite this thing bothering me so much that I've been mulling it over for months. I really like unique fantasy worlds, and I'm hoping at some point in her next work this thing that happened is addressed in some way. I need the goddess's actions and feelings about this situation to be talked about....
Anyway this took about six hours to read? So I tried to avoid all plotpoints even using the word goddess is a bit of a way to avoid spoiling a plotpoint. And be aware, I still really like this VN. I even drew one of the main characters'! I would not write about it this many months later if I did not like it <3
2023-01-02
18+
I'VE BEEN FOOLED. I'VE BEEN BAMBOOZLED. Also sorry for two 18+ entries so close together haha.
Bad Thought Diary... It was supposed to be a cute manga about a friend having a sex dream about her friend and realizing she's in love with her!! and it FOOLED ME. It was that at first, but you know what.. It's my fault. I didn't read the big drama tag, but you know.. I didn't expect the drama to be.. So bad.
Like.. GIIRL. GIIIIRL. YOU KNOW HOW MUCH OF THIS COULD'VE BEEN AVOIDED IF THE PROTAGONIST WASN'T An idiot? OR IF YUNA JUST LEARNED TO SMACK SOMEONE!!!! Oh my god. Oh my god. Drama can be really well done I feel, but it was just really poorly written here. Especially considering the person causing all of this drama is just a manipulative college student.
I read like 31 chapters of this but there was such a dumb plotpoint that I had to drop it. I couldn't do it anymore. It's not fair.
And you know I expected it to be better because I'm pretty sure the artist is a lesbian, but there's like a borderline rape scene that happens and you know.. It was really disturbing. Can't trust anyone to write yuri and be normal about it i guess.
Sorry this is probably the most ineloquent and ranty thing I've written so far. I really was disappointed by this manwha. It's the first thing I read this year, and I just really wanted cute lesbian content. I'm going to download a bunch of lesbian visual novels to my steam deck and it will fix me.
2023-01-02

The title is "Fucking Trans Women" #0. The author passed away recently as a result of cancer. Rest in peace. I wish I’d been able to speak to you.
For some time now, I’ve been feeling a strange repulsion by sex. I think it’s the result of pornography depicting the same acts over and over again. Porn scares me. It looks like no one is having fun, and sometimes, people are obviously being hurt. I associated penetration with violence, being bare in the presence of another human being as distressing, and I decided I’d never let anyone come near me. I knew in theory there was love in sexual acts, but it just seemed so vile to me.
It’s probably obvious I have some trauma as well, but honestly, it feels hard to find a girl without trauma in this world of ours. Why would I view an act of passion as something that could be good when it is often depicted as a tool for dominance and violence? Often, the earliest exposure many humans in the 20th century have to sex is through pornography.. And I think that’s so terrible.
This zine really made me see some things clearly. I struggle to put my thoughts into words without revealing too much about myself, but this zine made me love my own body more. I love the human body, all bodies, even if I am afraid of them. And this increased my love so much more. Mira Bellwether’s description of her own body led me to thinking about my own. It feels like cracks in the shell I’ve grown to separate myself from other people have bits of light shining through. Maybe it would be worth it? To connect with someone in that way?
I am still afraid of others, but at least I find beauty in pleasure.
The art and writing of trans women is always astounding me. I love you all dearly, and you continue to make me love myself and you with everything you create. You are in my heart. Once again, rest in peace Mira Bellwether.
2022-12-26

I am now trying to exit the depression coccoon I've embedded myself in, and the first step towards doing that is by reading.. I think. I haven't updated in almost a month haha. Anyway, Usuzumi No Hate! There's only 8 chapters, but I think I've read enough to have a solid opinion of it.
Usuzumi No Hate is another post apocolyptic manga. Rather than the folly of humans resulting in their end, it was aliens. I had a conversation with my friend Zed about this manga so I will be paraphrasing a lot of what we talked about.
I really want to love Usuzumi No Hate. The art is lovely and unique. The cross hatching is gorgeous, and it's one of those manga that try to have interesting things to say about the human condition.
There are poignant moments. Chapter five has a scene that did make me feel the desperation the author was trying to get across...
I hate to compare manga, but it kind of reminds me of Girl's Last Tour but not as good. Each chapter has its own storyline that is supposed to make the reader think, but the protagonist of Usuzumi No Hate is very quiet. Quiet storytelling can be really effective, but I just don't think it works very well in this story specifically.
In Girl's Last Tour, Chi and and Yuuri talk to each other often though there is often silence as well... It's a very nice balance. The protagonist of Usuzumi No Hate kind of just.. She sometimes reacts but it just feels.. Empty. She has the ability to express empathy. She carries around a tiny pet with her. She sometimes experiences sadness or shock, but she doesn't really say anything. I really like quiet protagonists and I do like this character, but I think the manga really would benefit from some of her insight.
Also I really dislike chapter 4. I have to admit it likely lowered my opinion of the manga a bit. I skimmed some of the other chapters before writing this, and despite my criticisms, I think it's a fine piece of media and I will continue reading it unless something happens that makes me dislike it. And if you haven't read anything like Girl's Last Tour, it's nice introduction to this kind of media. Girl's Last Tour does what this manga is trying to do much better, but if you like that story, you'll probably like this one.
2022-12-21

I read Welcome to NHK and had an interesting conversation with my friend about it about it because it's.. A unique piece of media with critical acclaim.. Though I'm aware some people consider the manga the worst adaptation.
Originally, I did not like Welcome to NHK at all. It was not what I expected. This was until Misaki got further development. Her development really peaked my interest. I can't really say what the deal with her is without spoilers, but in the conversation I mentioned earlier I said "I really can’t imagine her being written differently and still ~enjoying~ Welcome to NHK."
Welcome to NHK isn't also completely aimed at me as a girl who doesn't consider themself deep in otaku culture, but at some point I was a NEET. It was absolutely miserable. I grew fearful of leaving my house. Once, my friend invited me out and all day I thought about cancelling because I was so scared something would go wrong.
I would still be a NEET if I didn't get scholarships to go to college, and sometimes, the lifestyle calls back to me... The comforting but suffocating feeling of living in your room playing games and watching anime or playing dating sims for days on end... It sounds heavenly at times even though I know for me, it only leads to misery. I know if college doesn't work out, I'll likely end up in that place again.
Some parts of Welcome to NHK really felt like looking into a distorted mirror. It wasn't quite me, but it was someone I could've been.
2022-11-22

Hm, this was one of the most miserable pieces of media I've read. It really.. hurts. To think about what abuse did to you. Could I have been a better person if I hadn't met you? What would I be like if I hadn't been told that particular thing when I was younger? Am I missing love? Should I love you? I still think about you all the time even after what you did to me. I was hoping you'd get mad at me and end it all. Let me tell my final lie.
I really wanted to be killed by you. And.. Honestly, I still love you after all this time. I wish you could stop making me so miserable. I hate you so much.
2022-11-14

I picked this up from the ShortBox Comics Fair. It made me so sad. I try to avoid things that are this sad, but I was a fool. The art just looked so beautiful in the previews Hana Chatani posted on twitter. I wanted to buy and consume it... I felt the characters' grief. It's been days since I read it and I still feel it now. It's a carefully thought out story and very well told. If you get the chance to pick it up, (I have no idea when Chatani will release this again now that this ShortBox Comics Fair is over) I recommend it!
2022-11-06

Shimeji Simulation is by the mangaka of girl's last tour, so i expected it to be good, and well it was. it took a moment for me to warm up to it. i've never been to fond of manga in the 4 koma style.. the only other one i've read is Poor Poor Lips and that was years ago.
I had a little theory about Shimeji Simulation that was proved true in the last few chapters which brings me a lot of joy. a story which can be predicted has laid its groundwork rather well. the characters in shimeji simulation are all enjoyable. Shijima's older sister.. I think about her frequently.
Shimeji Simulation isn't finished yet, so expect me to come back to this one.
2022-10-30

I really enjoyed Uzumaki. I hate to sound like I am repeating myself but it is now one of my favorites. It was an interesting read as a psychotic person (I realize this was unintentional. I will probably write about it). It was also horrifying. There was one image in here that shocked me. I'll just say it was in the hospital chapter.
I'm really excited for the anime next year. I want to say more, but.. Psychosis write up coming eventually!!!
2022-10-09

Another post apocolyptic work. This one really reached me. It's more "We are living our daily lives at the end of the world," but unlike Yokohama Kaidashi Kikuo, this has tragedy.. The art in this is beautiful. The mangaka really gets across that they are exploring the end of the world. The setting is very fascinating as well. It takes place in a city with multiple levels with interesting technology. I really like Ishii. The chapter Oblivion really reached me. It caused me to feel a great sadness. I'll definitely come back to this manga and write a longer page on it one of these days.
2022-10-09

I really liked this manga. It is now one of my favorites of all time. It's a post apocolypse work (genre I love) about an android running a cafe. It's a very beautiful work with an air of melancholia I adore. The characters age and you relate to them losing their childhood as they grow older. The character Alpha is wonderful though my favorite was Kokone. I found her relatable. There's also another reason she's my favorite which is probably very obvious if you read the manga haha.
Anyway, the beauty of the end of the world really shines through. It's something I love. This made me want to read more things like this.... Maybe I will read Girl's Last Tour next or pick Nausicaa back up
2022-10-04

I reread My Lesbian Experience with Loneliness yesterday. It feels more relevant to me than last time I read it now that I am working and in school and my complete lack of understanding of how to socialize is really crippling my life. Kabi Nagata's relationship with gender continues to be relatable to me, and the desire to be held by an older mature woman.. I understand T_T To feel comfortable and safe..
It was really uncomfortable to read, in a good way (this is true of all of Kabi Nagata's works). There's a lot of pain in this manga and I hope it helps people understand the agony of mental illness. There was a part in it about looking for a place to belong. She turned to work for this.. At my old job, my manager said we spend more time with each other than we do with family. Isn't that interesting to think about? I feel really stressed when thinking about relationships at work. I think that's probably why.
2022-10-03

The manga Our Dreams at Dusk: Shimanami Tasogare has been on my reading list forever. I was just craving another manga with LGBTQ themes and wow, I'm really happy I read this one. Our Dreams at Dusk is about gay people renovating buildings (this is a simplification). It has a very honest depiction of people of different identities supporting each other throughout each other's lives. I felt seen by the character Anonymous (I believe she is called Someone in the official English release). It felt like the author had looked into my heart and made a character especially for me. This means there's other people on Earth who understand Anonymous (including the writer). There's other people like me in this world. It makes me want to cry.
2022-10-01

I read Junji Ito's Cat Diary a few months ago. It was so cute. So cute. Oh god I love cats. I'm a dog person, and so is Junji Ito, but this manga really made me fall in love with those little creatures. Junji Ito's wife is funny and the illustrations of her never failed to make me laugh. The cats, Yon and Muu, are the most adorable creatures. It's always fun to see their personalities.
2022-09-22

Another manga by Ebine Yamaji! I read it last night. Indigo Blue is a story about cheating. There is no way around it. It really makes you dislike the protagonist, Rutsu. There are other reasons to dislike the protagonist as well, but I think Ebine Yamaji is well aware of this. It was an interesting read. The love interest of Rutsu is very likable to me though you know very little about her. I wish we'd been able to spend more time with her.
I always enjoy reading Yamaji's work because it reaffirms that I am a lesbian. The way she describes her character's feelings are so relatable to me. Seeing how a lesbian navigates her relationship with a man while having a lover on the side was fascinating even if it was a bit painful.I'll probably reread it again in the future.
2022-09-22

I really enjoy Belzebubs. I read bits of it on Instagram a few years ago though Instagram just isn't very great for reading webcomics.. I lost track of where I was because it's Instagram. Anyways, the creator has been uploading it to webtoon. It brings me a lot of joy. While I'm not a satanist, I am goth so seeing these goth-adjacent characters living their happy horrific lives brings me a lot of joy. It's one of the few slice of life works I enjoy.
2022-09-21

Daily Jojo is a webcomic by Donggeon Lee, the creator of one of my favorite comics, Yumi's Cells. I've been reading it for a while. Embarrassingly enough, I must admit one of the cliff hangers got me and I spent 99 cents to see the next chapter. It was worth it. Something I'd long been waiting for happened and I shouted "that's what i've been waiting for!!!!!" It was so exciting for me. I really love Donggeon Lee. He's a fantastic writer.
I haven't even mentioned what it's about. It's about the friendship of Eunjo Lee, a messy office worker, and Wan Jo, a very put together office worker. They rub off on each other. I really connected with Wan Jo and feel for him. Both characters are really likable. I wish I could read it nonstop all the time. The chapters are at a nice sweetspot9
2022-09-21

I started The Guy She Was Interested In Wasn't A Guy At All a few days ago. It's cute. I used to read lots of yuri in high school, so reading this was a nice throwback to that time in my life. The updates are really short. It reminds me of reading old school webcomics. The title really explains the premise. Girl meets a guy, forms a crush, and Surprise! The guy is actually an androgynous girl. I have no strong feelings about it really.
2022-09-20

I really like Kabi Nagata and enjoy all of her works. Of her work, this is my least favorite one though contains the quote "To Japanese people, alcohol is alcohol" which made me laugh.
I always feel a deep sadness reading Kabi Nagata's work. This did not evoke that deep sadness for me. I believe Nagata was struggling with how to approach writing about her personal life, and she discusses it in this manga. It really shows in the writing.
2022-09-20

My Wandering Warrior Existence... I read this a few months ago. I found it on the shelf at Barnes and Noble and spent the last of my money of it as a big Kabi Nagata fan. It really made me think about marriage and what it means to me. As someone who struggles with interpersonal relationships and can't imagine using a dating app or trying to pick someone up at a bar, it really reached me. The discussion of gender also made me laugh as someone who also doesn't really have the energy to think about gender.
There's also a rather description of csa in this manga just as a warning to anyone interested in reading it. There's a warning in the manga itself and a page to skip to. I'd like to write about the first books in Kabi Nagata's series after I reread them.
2022-09-20

Chainsaw Man was a really good read. I read it because I saw Dorohedoro fans talk about it, and I love Dorohedoro!! The title is literal!! It's the tale of a chainsaw man. I'm really looking forward to the anime coming this fall. I'm curious how they'll deal with how fast paced it is. There were pages of action much like Dorohedoro. I'm excited to see Power on screen. Did you know I actually drew Power a few months ago? I should add it to the gallery.
I got a bit off topic. I think Chainsaw Man has very interesting things to say about love. It is a core theme. I also really enjoyed the twists and turns of Chainsaw Man. It was really difficult for me to predict what would happen next. Sometimes... I think of the ending and go "haha what was that?"
2022-09-20

I read Free Soul yesterday, so this is fresh on my mind. I really like Ebine Yamaji's stories. Partially because she seems to really enjoy drawing black characters. It sparks a lot of joy. She always does a really good job too!! But the main reason I got into her work is because I was searching for yuri with adult characters.
My feelings regarding Free Soul.. I enjoyed her other work Love My Life a more. The characters in this story were likeable, and the story itself was solid, but.. I disliked the ending. It felt like I needed a bit more to time to justify it.
2022-09-20

Love My Life is a manga with a lot of gay people and a likeable straight character. It is the first work I read by Ebine Yamaji, and I think of it fondly. I actually watched the movie first, and they're very similar.. There's aspects of both I like more than the other. The worst thing is that the movie it does not depict Take-chan's boyfriend.. And also... I feel like the movie makes Ichiko a bit too blameless in one situation. If you watch the movie or read the manga, you might know what I'm referring too.
I think Ebine Yamaji has a thing for lesbian skinheads.
2022-09-20

I read My Heart is A Chainsaw while on my way to college. It was part of my aspiration to read more books as I was an avid reader as a child but fell off... This was an exciting start. The book quickly engrossed me. The protagonist is an indigenous girl named Jade living in a gentrifying town. She has an obsession with slasher filmns and the events in her life seem to be mirroring that of one of her films. The question is: is she delusional or is the world around her really that of a horror flick? It was a long read, but I read it nonstop over the course of 4 days.. On car rides, in amusement park lines, at restaurants. I hope to read more by Stephen Graham Jones. It's part of a trilogy actually. The next book is already out.. If I had money I'd buy it.
2022-09-19

It has been many years since I read My Little Monster. At first I thought I was a freshman in high school, but it's worse than that. I must've been in my second or third year of middle school. I remember reading it on the computers in my creative writing class. I based my emotions on Shizuku Mitzuni's.. I don't think I can ever reread this manga as it is definitely not as good as I remember. I tried to once, and the rape threat in the first volume made me close it forever. Middle school me loved the characters because they reminded me of myself. I'd never seen a slice of life manga with such extreme degrees of mental illness. I'd never seen protagonists quite like Shizuku and Haru. It felt like they were placed in the wrong genre, but for me, it felt like home.
I still have some of the pages from My Little Monster saved on my tumblr and they remind me of the feelings I felt in middle school. The endless loneliness, the days repeating, my disconnect from others. I can't bring myself to read My Little Monster again, but some part of me still believes there are sparks of genius in that strange manga.
2022-09-19

Yumi's Cells was a webtoon by the artist Donggeon Lee. I read throughout high school. It was a refresher. I'm really fond of stories about adults. I think modern day media has a strange fixation on youth, so seeing Donggeon's work about office workers makes me very happy.
You go through the life of Yumi and her cells. Her cells represent her various emotions such as love, lust, hunger. It taught me some things about love. It ended during my senior year of high school, and I was so happy to reach the conclusion but grieved over my comfort webtoon no longer updating.
2022-09-19

I think I read Sweet Home during my senior year of high school or maybe sometime afterwards. It was a very good read, and I'd recommend it to anyone who wants to start reading webtoons. It makes you understand Why people spend so much money on fastpasses. The cliff hangers are good, the characters are very well-written. The story is excellent. My primary issue with it is that it is a bit short. The conclusion made me wish for more.. I need to reread it
2022-07-05