I get asked about my wardrobe a lot and whole I used to answer in a pretty excited tone, I've realized it can be overwhelming for people/90% of the time they stop listening in the first sentence, and discussing it so much with those who lose interest in my words is exhausting for everyone involved.

So I've divided this little guide into sections to address each thing seperately. All of my tips can be ignored and you can skip straight to the links if you want, and I don't even have to know!

Also, all of this is from the perspective of a lifestyle lolita with old school tastes. You don't need to buy anything here with the intent of being a lifestyle lolita or even wearing old school, but it just influences how I talk since this is about my own personal shopping habits.

_{Note: If you read this, don't tell me. Only let me know if you bought something using this guide. You can even show me things you're considering buying, but only if you're using this guide. I have had lots of people tell me they're considering buying things or ask me for lots of links but never actually buy anything. I truly get excited when my friends get into lolita or kawaii fashions I also like so when you tell me that you're considering buying something but you don't, it's not something I enjoy. Socializing is something that takes up a lot of energy for me...}

Before You Shop/Buy

Regarding Sizing, you need to know your measurements. If you eyeball your size, you're going to get the wrong thing- even if you don't the first dozen times. Fashion sizes are all over the place- from brand to brand, from nation to nation. You may get lucky for a long time- especially if you're on the smaller side, but well, know the size inconsistency goes both ways.

A measuring tape is cheap and you can find them at random stores like CVS or Walgreens for really cheap.

TLDR: Take your measurements, or it's gonna be wrong.

Also to note: Sometimes people measure things flat. If the waist size is under 20 inches, it's being measured flat (though larger sizes can be measured flat too and may be a higher number). You multiply it by two to get the actual measurement. IE if it's a 14 inch waist, it's around 28 inches.

There are a million guides for taking your measurements- images and videos. I'll include some but you're free to look up others that are shorter in length. I encourage you to google. Cosplayers also have to take their measurements often so you'll find a lot of resources there too surely.

Also, if you have wide shoulders or a specific kind of measurement that isn't accounted for (like a wider neck), you need to either ask the shops what the shoulder measurement is or seek out of a shop that provides shoulder measurements if you don't want to ask.

Okay so, I'm not plus sized and as a result, many of my links won't account for plus sizes since this is a shopping guide of things I wear. I will have a section for plus sizes, but I can't really give you information about those brands a lot of the time since I don't have any experience with them at the moment. I mainly want to clear up some misconceptions regarding Asian brands and give you some tips with my limited knowledge based on conversations I've had with plus sized friends..

TLDR: there are options that exist. Brands that exist specifically for you, people trying to make things accessible to you, etc etc. It's a lot harder for you though and can even be more expensive at times, but I recommend making social media accounts or designated spaces where you only follow plus sized people in the fashions you like, so that you're able to actively see what they're wearing or ask them about it (if they're the kind of person to respond to comments.) There's an entire plus sized Chinese fashion community that exists and a much larger community in the West as well. Please acknowledge and make use of their hard work! Look at these documents and spreadsheets and blogs! I could never make that!

I care about quality a lot and don't have a lot of interest in talking about fast fashion. If you talk to me about Shein or Amazon or other brands known for large mass produced low quality items, I may become a bit unresponsive- not because I'm judging you but because I've had the conversation regarding that a million times.

Also, I clear up something regarding Taobao. Taobao is an aggregate that has a variety of brands on it at different price points. Some are high quality brands, some mass produce replicas, some are garbage. Taobao brands can even make replicas of other taobao brands for context. I've bought $20 dresses from Chinese brands and $120 dresses from Chinese brands. All items I've bought from Taobao have been high quality because I do research on the things I buy before getting them (though there still have been difficulties due to me having sensory issues). There's a lot of lolitas who hate Taobao, many who love it, and many who buy from Taobao who do it in a completely different way from me. It's up to you to figure out how you want to approach Taobao and what your standards for quality are. And well not just quality, but what are your preferences? Sometimes things are 'high quality' but you still hate them on your skin.

Anyway if you talk shit about Taobao to me, I'm probably going to lose interest in the conversation love because I've had every conversation I can have about reasons to dislike Taobao one million times. Also, assuming all Chinese factories use slave labor is insane and stupid.

There are multiple ways to find things. Here's how I've done them over time as my internet habits have changed.

You need to interact with the subculture in some way to find things you like. Fortunately, social media is a thing that exists, so you can keep your interactions one sided if you don't want to talk to anyone.

To add one more thing, I don't use any jfashion subreddit or large public Discord. I can't tolerate being in them, so interactions you have in them will vary. I'm mainly in private friend discords and local discords.

Prices are gonna vary depending on what you buy. I think some things you can get deals with and accumulate quickly while other things you should not skimp out on. Jfashion is basically the same as any collector's hobby, but you're just wearing your collection. Many lolitas aren't wealthy. There are a lot of who middle class or below, but it's something they choose to invest money into. It's a Slow Fashion, and many lolitas who have larger wardrobes have been in the hobby for years (though some are certainly rich).

Well, you're probably thinking, what about accessories? Surely I can just get some cheap accessories from Aliexpress. Well, I talk about it briefly, with my own shopping habits and experiences.

Here are some brands I buy from. More may or may not be added. It really depends on my energy and memory lol.

I'll add notes if I think thye're necessary. Big Japanese brands don't need introduction. So many people have done that better than I ever could.

I'm going to list my favorites and some I'm keeping an eye on. Not every brand I buy from is here nor every brand I'm spectating because Chinese brands come and go and I'd like for this list to not become completely useless. It will probably be useless someday though considering how weird Taobao is with its links.

Also to add on, CN brands I follow will often make a large variety of items. Some may be more consistent with their releases though. It can be hard to figure out what CN brands you like because a lot of CN releases aren't properly archived

I really recommend using Rednote or some other Chinese social media if you really like Taobao releases. Chinese Lolita Updates just isn't very thorough (though I appreciate their efforts) and lolibrary doesn't really have a lot (I know I could add some in theory to slowly contribute to archival work for these brands.. I know.). If you don't know about releases as they are being made/when they drop, you're going to miss them and possibly never be able to buy them again!!

Okay so, this list is probably gonna be all over the place. I love Indie baby and try to actively support brands coming into existence without the existing infrastructures of Japan and China you see!

I'll miss some indie brands I like. So many indie brands only post on Instagram, and I don't really use Instagram a lot because using it is like touching poison ivy to me. I'll probably add more to this section over time as I remember and more indie brands pop up.

Some brands I don't own things by, but plan to eventually. Or I just keep up with their drops.

I don't have experience with some of these, but it's here because a lot of people ask me about it. I'm not the best person to ask though and truthfully I think it'd be best to ask other plus sized lolitas, but I know my tastes are magnificent *hears gun cocking* and everyone wants to know what I love so so mu- mala is shot in the head for her hubris.

Hey so.. You might be wondering.. Where do I get my shoes..? Um, well, to be honest, I don't buy a lot of lolita shoes. I actually buy shoes once or twice a year, and I tend to keep my eyes on shoes for a very long time. I don't keep up with new shoe releases and tend to eye different things. I also like buying shoes in person at the mall sometimes.

I don't feel super confident offering many shoe brands aside from Antaina (will make custom shoes for you if you're out of their range of sizes / if there's a design you want). Angelic Imprint also exists though I don't have a link to them on hand, but they're available from plenty of Taobao resellers (and you can just image search from Taobao from there if you want.) Antaina makes rocking horse shoes which are the ones I own.

I prioritize comfort and cuteness which is why I buy shoes so rarely. I need things I can wear everyday. Orthopedic mary janes are the way, but they're so expensive that it's hard to really buy them often. Oh well.

Omg you made it. Or you skimmed through it. I'll give you a gold star anyways. Sorry I'm missing some things, but like I said, I buy so much from all over the place lol, and I just don't think jfashion is as simple as me giving you 20 links and going on your way. At least it isn't to me. It might be that way to you, but in that case, I don't really wanna discuss it with you you know? Because we aren't the same, so it's not really that fun for me since we aren't into it the same way. It's kind of an aesthetics vs subculture thing. I really encourage you to find people interested in it the same way you are because I'll just disappoint or overwhelm you. I have no desire to tone down my passion for other's comfort or feign interests in a subject that does not matter to me.

Since I'm at the end and you presumably read most of this, I must admit that I have been a bit worried about my tone. I've had so many negative conversations with non-lolitas (or well, even some lolitas) that I find myself being a bit on edge when discussing this subject matter. Truthfully, I am someone who hates having the same conversations over and over again and when I explain something but someone asks me about something included in my prior explanation, I stop responding thoughtfully.

I also know I didn't explain a lot. I just said brand names, didn't explain the importance of brand, said 'gobe' without context, and didn't point out any notable OS items.. It's cause.. Well, a lot of this stuff is pretty easy to find resources for, and if you some reading or look through jfashion scans, you'll figure it out! Though you might not figure out Taobao admittedly, but there are guides that exist HAHA.

If you do take any of this to heart despite my eccentricies, thank you. If you don't, that's fine. You're free to talk shit about me. I know I can be a bit mean. I do try my best to be a good teacher though so I appreciate you for trying to get through this anyways!

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